Aaaaand ... Faceplant ...!?

So, how's that for a real-life example of how I get myself way too excited over something I ... might have known better about?

I mean - I'm really - getting to an end here because I'm really ... running out of ... I think, we're back at 'second looks'. It might be that he's just messing around, doing this whole 'click' ... I mean yea, there's a hint in the 'Science finds God?' video as - on the one side he says he's the first person - in the video he said that he had to first see it happening. And even if I totally ignored him, I now have to look into that thing I compared to 'dark matter'. There is someone or there isn't - if there isn't ... I'm feeling kindof fucked. At least the problem then isn't one I can't solve continuing as I do or did, so ... so - I'm back to waiting ... until I just know what the fuck I got to do. - I guess ... well, ... well - I do still feel something's burning inside of me ... I just ... don't really know how this does or will go on. I ... guess I should first of all chill, wait for my money, smoke some weed, ... and get my head straight about what the fuck I just wrote the past few days. I mean ... my intention was to just write it all out, no bias, and see what'd come to my mind in process, analyzing it, ... and now there is this conflict. I was in the middle of investing something, happened to write stuff that changed how I had to think about it ... stopped there and then 'What the ... LOL'; Which I didn't expect but it just dropped right into the context; ... and I don't want to justify myself ... but I feel like I've moved to a point that ... well, maaaan, ... it doesn't make any sense or it makes perfect sense!


The only thing yet there is that the support I secretly have ... its either people that are Unified the one or the other way, like, people/friends from the past that are just spiritually here ... and - all in all I'm actually bound to be positive about whats to come; But ... that isn't really new - just, things got better and I wonder for how long they can keep becomming better until it either makes no sense anymore or just has to break into my bubble.

Wired or Weird?

by Christopher Nikolaus Sonnberger | 2016.11.25 - 18:15