A collapse of insanity

"Everybody does it". That seems to be the crux of ... ur - hoohoo. 'The Crux' ... yea right [cynical] - as if there's just 'one' thing ... OK, let me rephrase that. Its something some people have been suspecting for some time now; Something that 'sane' people wouldn't want to hear about (calling 'em tinfoil-hat wearing paranoids) ... err ... slip of my tongue.

Isn't it unfair to 'downplay' other people?

To rant about seemingly stupid things that "people" do?

I'm not an SJW! I most definitely am not! And I might go on a long tangent as to why that is, how come - like, whether I'm choosing my side by thinking about which one is more successful. Well, why am I not a feminist then?

Because its silly? Well - seems like a reason for not being an SJW then!


But - as a Christian, am I not supposed to ... ? Well - no! The whole reason why I consciously chose to 'not' learn/study religion in school was because of my 'suspicion' that all I'd learn there would be bollocks/wasted time.


But isn't it mean?

Well - I had an interesting dream tonight that should make up an article of its own; But things flow the way they flow!


So, some people are inevitably more stupid than others. Regarding that we possibly need a rather complicated presentation to showcase the various dynamics within various relevant frames of reference - but on a bold note would I suggest that only a small percentage of people can claim being 'above average' in 'most' fields of the spectrum.

A 'good' metric to focus on is the greater relevance of 'average'. If all of us were somehow equally smart in all things, the average wouldn't be too far from the top nor the bottom of the spectrum. You might be found 'relatively' stupid; But still smarter than ... someone who is relatively smart in a less advanced society.

But I'll get back to that later as the headline here is basically in regards to this dream.



Back to "the" crux. We are being lied to - and it is getting more and more evident and obvious. Not only that - more and more data surfaces on a nearly daily basis that just shows us how rotten the world is we live in. Even if all that data were fake; It would still create the same argument.

What is Kekistan?

Am I Kekistan? What if I'm not goint to tell you what Kekistan is? Would you bother to find out? What would you find? How could you know that what you found is what I have meant? Maybe I dropped a hint you would only register if you found the right thing.


Its as much of a real problem than drowning in shit. How much shit? Well - just ... "think about" Gamergate. Same problem as with Kekistan. Kindof. The issue at large here is transparency. Or, our perception of the world based on the media we consume. What media 'do' we consume? How active or passive are you about it? Objectively there is reason to suggest that the list of media you consume is revealing just how 'naive' or "stupid" or ~enlightened~ you are. And that is just a thing. If you consume fake news there is no way around 'just putting it as it is'. You consume 'fake news' - and that is aggrovating to all those that try to combat the spread of it!

Maybe psychologically there is truth to the sensitive stance though. If you were consuming fake news and I called you 'smart', you might find yourself more willing to look at the stuff that I'm watching; Be it fake news or not. How to say?

We can start by expressing the things we believe in. I believe climate change is a thing and that we humans have an influence to it. That is already 'arrogant' though because by saying this I tell you that you are stupid if you don't believe that! So, just throw science and reason over board because its offensive, right?


To understand climate change you don't even have to understand a lot of the science. You only need to realize that if there are 10 people in a room and one of the nine farts - you're possibly going to smell it. Depending on how big of a room we're talking about. Cow stables are rather large rooms - and I think most of them aren't air-tight. Yet they smell! If you're in a pub and you go outdoors real quick and come back in - and you experience the thickness of the air; There's another thing to think about.
The problem 'on earth' is that - even if you're a Flat Earther and go by the Bible - there is that 'dome'. Be it a dome of "glass" that keeps us in this atmosphere or 'gravity' that binds the many particles that compose our atmosphere to the ground is more or less irrelevant. You would need to be an 'Ecosystem denier' to really not get this point! Fuel can be stored in tanks; And if we burn it that fuel somehow transforms into smoke which is spreading in our atmosphere. It seems to somehow magically go away; But do that in a closed room and you'll make a different experience!

If you take a dump in the corner of your room its gonna look worse than if you take a dump in a forrest. That because the turd is occupying a percentually larger amount of the space. And yea - that stuff doesn't magically disappear if you do it "outside" is part of the whole climate change problem! We have toilets and they don't make stuff magically disappear either! We have recycling facilities that reprocess trash or water - but they haven't been appearing magically out of nowhere either! At least I don't know any "and on the 8th day God created recycling facilities" passage.


Climate Change is one of those things. With Republicans sporting the whole denial agenda it somewhat becomes acceptible. We so moved closer to the "Everybody does it" way of looking at it; And if we want a more toxic/advanced example we can look at Gamergate. Gamergate is a word - "what matters is what the word implies". How did it come about? That is relevant. It was an uproar from gamers against the gaming press; And some of the more prominently featured articles sport headlines in the likes of "Gamers are stupid". Thats like Ferrari saying that Sportscar fans are stupid! Are they? Some might agree! And I guess we could artificially create a similar mess around this. ... What then happened is now history. One way of telling the story is to say that: now that there has been an angry mob of sorts - some people took it upon themselves to deliberately piss those people off to then label them as a hate-mob; And so the whole agenda of Gamergate has been spun against its initiators. The idea would have been to create awareness of certain things that go wrong; Using social media to connect and create resistence - and it worked well ... sortof. I wasn't aware of Gamergate for a long time though. And that despite having been spent a lot of time on YouTube and the internet. I guess I may have seen a TED talk of Anita Sarkeesian instead and without any proper context found her points compelling. On that end of the narrative Gamergate is synonymous for "all those gamers that make silly death threats on the internet". And because that narrative has been the one that bigger media outlets chose to perpetuate - it is nowadays "common sense" that Gamergate is composed of a bunch of idiots!
With the bigger media outlets now being decidedly on the wrong side - the efforts that Gamergaters make to work against those misconceptions are pretty much in vain. "Don Quixotte" sends his regards. And from my end: Welcome to the club!

Ignoring my contribution to that - the bigger picture is simply that Gamergaters are misrepresented; And if you tried to lecture someone "captured" by 'mainstream media' you might find yourself standing on the shorter end of the lever. What are you trying to accomplish? "Why Mr. Anderson, why do you persist?".


OK, the "everyone 'does' it" sentence doesn't fit into the Gamergate thing; But the idea is the same. If everyone "does it" - not caring about Climate Change - we're going to live in a polluted future. If the dominant narrative became that Climate Change isn't real - then sure you can go on and pollute the environment without feelings of guilt; "What could you do about it?"; But the moment you realize or rationalize the stupidity thereof you're going to find yourself in a tough spot!

And believing in God doesn't change anything! If you're a Muslim think about Christians or Atheists; If you're a Christian think about Muslims or Atheists. These 'opposing' groups are to your understanding misrepresenting God - and a believer within those groups would need your help to know the truth. 'Your' help - not Gods help - because - ... else those opposing groups wouldn't exist; Or you wouldn't need to worry that a true believer might grow up within one of those.


"Everyone does it" is a strong and compelling argument however. No matter on which end of the spectrum you find yourself - it is still going to be both: Good and bad. The spread of any ideology is dependent on that; "Even so" Atheism. Atheism as primarily best example is an ideology of rationality. Its spread strongly depends on the realization of the values of scientific evidence - or eventually the lack of evidence for God (although I believe that there can be such a thing as an Atheistic believer (new thing - sortof)) - ... err. Yea, what is an Atheistic believer? First of all - an Atheistic believer will be recognized as an Atheist by someone that is unaware of the 'proper context'. On the other end it is expected of a 'grown up' to understand the concept behind the idea and to so filter the ideas of a believing Atheist in accordance to its own beliefs. The believer Atheist isn't an unbeliever - yet his ideology isn't dependent on theology. Ignoring God and his work makes space for belief in rationality. And you'll find some tendencies of that within my arguments. We can say that God is who makes the planets move - and that is as correct as saying that its in part due to gravity.
However. If the 'it' that everyone does is a good thing - its a good thing!
Any ideology eventually 'sits' on some 'common sense' - and common sense is as close to 'everyones belief' as it gets. But common sense can be wrong!

And so we can see the dangers. And we can see how this 'simple fact' can be exploited. It 'is' exploitable because it is reliable. It is something that cannot be removed from the equasions - and wherever there is a 'thing' we 'need to be' aware of in order to get things right; There is the other side of doing it wrong. Perhaps deliberately. Perhaps to some bigger goal. I mean - alcohol/liquors are the result of deliberately "doing something wrong" - a.k.a.: Letting stuff rot away instead of consuming it while still "good".
(Comedy can be compared to Alcohol)
Anti Drug believers might want to believe that the wine Jesus created and drank wasn't alcoholic - but wine is nonetheless that alcoholic drink that is closest to its non alcoholic counterpart. So to the point that "arguably" wine and grape-juice are the same thing! (And wine is healthy!)


Well - all this might equate to beating a dead horse; But sometimes we just got to make sure that it is really dead! It is going to die eventually - #rollingstone - but either God does 'all' the work or it is yet taking our own interests in sanity into account.

For the most part I think this is me just wanting to make sure that you understand my position. I've tried so many times before; But yea ... whatever.


And so, yea - 'technically' I am a SJW (Social Justice Warrior). I can easily find myself making samey points; But thats what respectable Anti-SJWs do! And there is a lot of comedic value within this SJW vs Anti-SJW thing. Like - SJWs having this weird idea that being Liberal and an Anti-SJW doesn't happen to make sense. Taking a more nuanced stance to it; The only way I can really settle on a positive note on the SJW movement is by basically drawing a stairway and putting them somewhere on the bottom as opposed to the Anti-SJW side thats somewhere closer to the top. Both groups have their legitimacy. Yea - I'm correcting myself. Sortof. The issue is not that SJW-ism is bad in principle; But because its vastly driven by extremely vague principles that everyone can get behind a lot of the nuance that is required to procure a reasonable outcome is getting lost. For ideologues like me, the world we live in today isn't so because we wanted it to be this way. Wouldn't we all want to live in a world where justice is served to everybody? The world is as it is because there are people with good intentions - opposed by the facts that say: Its not that simple!
The narrative of SJWs is that we live in a perfectly dark world. "Everything is sexist, everything is homophobic - and you have to point it all out" (Anita Sarkeesian). Compare such to Thunderf00ts 'If men acted like Feminists' (err ... OMG SEXUAL OBJECTS!!!! version ???) - err ... I think I should comment on that a bit further? Nah. Its often brought up: Compare our society to an Islamistic one and find the differences. Is ours perfect? No. But look at our past: We've evolved!
What I'm saying here is in some way the same thing SJWs say. The absence of sexism is good! I'm not saying that today is good. But, what qualifies as good is sortof ... non-established. Sure, if what Anti-SJWs have to say is that things are perfectly fine the way things are its sortof bullshit too ... err ... whatever.

But here now the "Everybody does it" thing - well. I wonder. What about Hollywood? Hollywood is into getting a lot of flack from feminists and bowing to their demands in consequence. The most recent input to my senses on this matter has been TJ Kirks TRIGGERED Episode from Yesterday (OCT 23, 2017) wherein an case has been brought up whereby Jason Momoa was forced to retroactively apologize for a statement from 2011. It seems like to them it seems that the whole world is on board with 3rd wave feminism and that the only ones that aren't, are sexist people (Ghostbusters). It seems like Hollywood is held hostage within an echochamber of feminist frequency. It couldn't be that people disliked this movie for anything other than Sexist reasons. Same for Star Trek Discovery - which is a thing I've been puking about separately (Anti Hollywood rant). It seems like Hollywood genuinely believes that womens feelings are hurt about this and that; Which only comes to show the divide as propagated by appearances.


But - let me now get into that dream I had. As of that I'll get to another point that then continues on the current narrative.


The part of the dream I remember is relatively short. I found myself in a semi-open landscape. Lots of small hills, tall grass obscuring dirt-ways, trees here and there and some mountainous rocks in the not too distant. I found myself next to other people and we were all outfitted like Pathfinders - and respectively there has been a leader. The leader then went on and made haste - and I'm not sure if it was just a game but alongside some hostile individuals seemed to come in from the right. So the leader moved on and all the Pathfinders followed him. Yet soon enough the distance between the pathfinders following him grew. As I started to move I soon stumbled over myself and instead of walking that what I did was somehow more akin to Octodad. So I somehow tried to keep up, being the last in line, and soon enough those ahead of me escaped my vision. I arrived at a dirt-path that would seemingly lead me towards the folks that came in from the right, so that wasn't the way I should go I noticed. I saw that the Pathfinders took a right hook though - but so I arrived at a rock and wasn't sure about whether I should turn left (moving straight ahead) or right. The fright from walking into the hands of those folks coming in from the right made me take a left turn - but after a few "steps" I rationalized that this can't be it. So I turned back, but again noticed that some others have gone the wrong way too - and thus I again truned around and that is round about the moment I woke up.

The main thing that sticks to my mind is the 'walking'. Or that my will to follow those ahead of me has led me to forgot how to walk, effectively. So walking itself has been confounded to a degree where I would have to focus on walking to keep up; While the panic led me to focus on my 'will' to keep up instead and therefore I ended up wildly moving my limbs to gain any sort of forward friction possible. The growing distance between each pathfinder would show the various levels of "walking profficiency".
Its an important aspect in and of itself. And it also comes to show us, as that is certainly a metaphor, the differences in profficiency alltogether. Yet - as I was about to wake up, the leader showed up around that splitting rock; And this idea provoked the sense of protection that dominated the first couple of thoughts I had during my wakening.

I so had to wonder: Maybe there were parents waiting at the far end of the road ahead - so even if I moved into the wrong direction I would end up in safety. At the very least did the group leader show up to make sure everyone would make it.

This provoked a few feelings and my primary concensus on those has been that: "Thank God for the 80s". Although I then ended up supposing that the most people might rather credit it to the 70s while the 90s would also make sense in that regard. I grew up in the 80s, was born in the 80s, so I don't know that much about the 70s ... but yea. Whats so ... awesome about it?
The upcoming of Video Games? The massive decline in Criminality? Those all seem to be fair points but ... not quite. The feeling I tried to put a finger on could best be described as 'domestic safety'. In that sense does Media contribute to that. We can get 'more' stuff nowadays from simply staying at home than we used to. That however goes too much into the direction of consumerism. What I'm thinking about is culture. In the distant past, life mostly happened outdoors. I would think of the marketplace as a public place corresponding to the beating heart of a society. And somewhere between those times and now there is that 'transition' - and at some point the defeat of the Nazis can be mentioned too.

I don't know - but - thinking about what these decades have 'done' I had to cry. Positively. Suddenly, as out of nowhere.


Now, drawing the line back to the issues of today - and yea, it almost feels insulting. The perpetuation of these SJW agendas seems like settled in a world that has been real decades ago; And by acknowledging those things I'd argue we'd sortof move backward. By acknowledging those things we'd acknowledge that we haven't accomplished anything. And with all the reboots of everything around - that seems to be perpetuated even more. "I really enjoyed Ghostbusters" - which one? "'X-Com Enemy Unknown' is one of the best games of all time!" ... "oops, I meant 'UFO Enemy Unknown'". (X-Com Terror from the Deep is the best X-Com game period!)

Awesome were the days where I was yet looking forward to new Stargate Episodes, nowadays it seems like Stargate never happened and I'm frightened to think about what the new Stargate might be like.


"Luckily" the 'good old times' statement is not really as dismissible as it used to be. Nostalgia? What an f*ing buzzword.

"Retro" stuff has a place in our culture because not everything that is old sucks! I'd prefer a good 'old school' bohemian meal over whatever modern "junk"-food trends these days. Sotospeak.


Whine whine! Whine whine whine, whine whine, whine whine. Whine whine whiney, whiney whine - whine-a-whine-whine, whine, whine whine.
Whining works. Look at children. If you're one of those kids that are capable of being the first to stop; You're arguably stupid - because if you just keep on whining, chances are things are going to be bent in your favour! [sarcasm/cynicism/black humor]

I mean - SJWs are in this ethnically superior position based on their claims and corresponding actions of saying that all humans are equal. Thats what they say - thats the general gist of their proclaimed content, the perpetuated consensus - but as quite a few have pointed out are 'aaaaaaall' the things that go beyond these basic generalities virtually everyone would agree with on the Level of faschism. The reason why a lot of us cannot let go of this might be the 'best example' of them all: Anita Sarkeesian. She, to luckily no serious effect, made it to speaking in front of the UN to make her case. Can't get any higher on the whining ladder than that!
And it is this incident, I think, that shocked us all the most. I'm sure that some if not most of 'us' were about to go like "Psh - whatever!" ... but, we ain't 'that' stupid. And in that sense I think I can be proud to be a gamer. "I'm 'not' with stupid!".
The thing there is 'censorship'. And perhaps its rather thanks to be people sitting in the UN than to Gamergate - which adds a slightly depressing spin to the story as Gamergate then helped Anita to be there in first place - though both, the UN and Gamergate, are here part of the same team. And so, why care about SJWs? Because we do care!

This is about whats right - and if wrong stuff goes on unchecked, we might be shocked to find ourselves waking up in a police state!

How many Jews would have believed that Hitler is about to unleash the Holocaust? "Everyone does it (believing that we aren't in any danger)" - so, "whatever"! Right?
But thats how such weird things can happen to begin with! Nobody taking them seriously that is! It is those that 'do' take them seriously that can then go on unchecked; Ideas are getting normalized - and to add insult to injury ... we're not over the Hill yet! Keyword: YouTube Adpocalypse. If Metatron is complaining about demonetization ... then I think there's reason to be concerned! If people like TJ Kirk can't do their thing because of YouTube cockblocking certain things from being monetized - the balance of free speech is in danger!

And why can/does this happen? Because of intransparency! Because "nobody" knows or cares! Except for those that do support these people via Patreon! So, its all good then, right?
[whiney carricature voice]: "But its the advertisers that pay the bill, so they should have the right to say what they support!". Like in politics you say? Where 'our' oppinion doesn't matter only counts 'after' the mighty ones have decided what choices we have. Choices like Hillary vs. Donald. Where's Bernie?

Why did I only hear about Bernie Sanders 'after' the election was over?

That sort of stuff.


It might seem like resistence got futile - but without any resistence; There cannot even be a concept for hope!

What I have/want to point out "by the way" is that Anti-SJWs are generally more reserved. To accuse the Anti-SJW side of extremism you have to sort them into the Alt-Right or whatever. And that fits my narrative. It fits really well. Its all about extremism. We could say OK: SJWs may not be perfect but they sport a good idea. Let it be dominant and let the extremists of tomorrow flip the balance again. And so on and so forth. Extremism vs Extremism may eventually take us to that sweet spot where we want to be. The main reason why Anti-SJWs are so reserved, I guess, is because of the nature of their motives. They aren't an organized bunch with a greater political agenda (that nobody is asking for) - but are simply 'cringed' to the point where they have to make a statement. It isn't extremism! Its just ... "Hey Moron!" (Undoomed).

"Gravity!"

And people can't help but laugh about other peoples stupidity. If I ever come accross like having forgotten how to walk as I aimlessly flap around with my extremes to somehow move forward - I'll embrace being made fun of. Certainly there is a limit; And certainly I would express my dislikes if said line got crossed - but if the sole purpose is to establish that high-ground of higher rationality I nonetheless have to accept the ridiculousness of my stupidity. Its problematic, but its common sense!

Being on the high ground and simply dismissive about those beneath isn't right either. I mean - its simple and obvious. But in the SJW vs Anti-SJW thing ... well ... just who 'is' on the high ground?

I mean ... I too have crouching tigers and hidden dragons within meself. And by those I don't mean things that I can discard from myself. Those come as "anomalies" of my proper self. By proper I mean: 'as advanced as it gets' #stateoftheart. Saying: I don't think that anyone can improve itself to the point of being free of them unless you got born that way. Which is possibly just a hypothetical sidenote.
At least do I recognize a darkness within my and I'm sure that some if not most don't have 'Monsters' as serious as mine. I'm not talking of my Clarity though. What I mean is an inherantly condescending attitude; One that would basically render me hostile towards you unless you sotospeak passed the test. Its weird to write/talk about it because 'of course' I can challenge myself to curb my dogs sotospeak while not doing so would simply just be me taking a defensive position. The more Anti-SJW content I consumed, the more I realized how not special I am. I mean - I was reliefed to see that my stance @you a.k.a. "puny humans" required some reconsideration. It wasn't fully serious to begin with, however ... there was a serious vein to it that I know existed and is within my responsibilities to handle.

And yea - as a Christian, the likes of TJ and Thunderf00t don't really 'shine' as those flattering individuals, perpetuators of common sense, on first glance; But after all I found myself more in tune with them than with any professing believer. And that was an easy thing too - because - most of their arguments make sense to me. I don't even have to look. The amount of things I disagree with are things basically unknown to in about just anyone; Being things that I try to communicate. Which comes down to just one thing: A convinced Atheists 'demands' solid evidence for God - anything else is just sophistry. And you maybe don't know how 'good' this felt. Up until I first noticed them I was worried. I was worried about the same things. That 'dumb' theosophy would go around empowering the Antichristian party. I mean, its kindof complicated - but what concerned me was a bold perception of the fortified ideologies. So I had a point perhaps nobody knew about - opposed by something like a Phantom Menace; Something dark and evil thats going around spreading misinformation and growing through the misconceptions that arise. From a simple point of view I assumed that the problem was misinformation about God. And yea - sure. Thats still what it is in general. All I yet had to learn is that the only way to not be misinformed about God in this world, or the 'best' way, rather, is to be an Atheist!

It shouldn't be hard to find how the Atheists of today are more closely walking in the footsteps of Christ than Christians!


As a believer that is misinformed about God - well - you don't have much of a choice. You can't say @Atheists "OK, you won! [Haha, laughing about my/yourself]" because they are yet factually wrong about that one thing.
And while Atheists would seem to be the better Christians - despite the change from this to that being superficially minor - the 'real' problems of adequately adjusting to the facts might be larger than apparent at first glance.

At some points there is a reverse psychology thing going on. Something one strongly distanciated itself from will eventually come snapping back with a bang. Sotospeak. Someone who bothered to get rid of supersticion and is all of a sudden confronted with the reality of an existing God ... I can see how that could be a somewhat difficult thing to handle.

In other words do I feel like a lot of gates are being opened - urging people to become active; While without the proper "walking practice" that might end up being like "Octodadding". The desire is there - and ... OK. The only real problem there is basically this reverse psychology phenomenon whereby the past is somehow devalidated through the present and future; Thus the forgetting how to walk.

This also happens to apply to me. We're about to enter a new tomorrow - and none of us has any experiences with it!
The way this is going to work is as they used to. Who can, can!


And I think this makes for a smooth ending here.



Goodness Gracious!

CNS.2017.10.24|15:31



I kindof don't like this guy. But this comes from a purely emotional position. One I'm inclined to withdraw when now more closely disecting what we are to understand as 'emotional reasons' or 'emotional positions'. The point is, ... well - you get it. Possibly. He said what I just said; Basically - just ... perhaps more reasonably so.

And yet, his edginess (edgy appearance) may provide enough of a negative first impression that would drag your conception of what he's saying into the dirt.
Now to something really fringe: Well - as of the recent horizontal line I've smoked weed again. And ... so when I think 'about' people, just in general - like here, being by writing dragged into some ... "linking my brain up to data concerning my [perceptions] of him"; Well, what is it? As of writing this sentence I've kindof moved away from that.

Well yea - I feel like ... and that is possibly now just enhanced by weed, I didn't really pay a lot of attention on it before (and will/do/would do so through this {notion}) ... in some weird floaty state of ... hmm. Well. I think there is no real point to mentioning it. Just a hunch. I rather have to go back to the beginning of all the things that end up mattering in regards to it. Does it ... or, did it come automatically? Just as a service provided by the Light? The machine in full effect?



Spiraling out of control this is. Need a short break to cool down!





















So OK, lets sort this in as ... {noted}.

Now as I'm ready to go on I still feel compelled to yet expand on certain things there. So, in the beginning ... we had ... "the Light". OK, what beginning? Unification. Once you are getting Unified ... you'll notice so because of a "swoosh" that is most definitely unlike anything that you have ever experienced before. The weight is on 'experience'. We could go on and make a visual representation thereof. I'm sure that once a Savant would make it in we might get some very interesting details on those matters.

What then happens is that, well - these experiences ... lets just get it ou... t of ... OK, I almost forgot what I wanted to say. This experience is what I now refer to as 'Light'. {note on clarity: I just zoomed away; Dragged into my collar. Now in my current state of distance to that topic, the emergence of its implications regarding my existence as Android is strange. Its presence has some weird vibe to it - making my heart beat faster and dragging my mind into something of a negative echozone, something with a certain vibe of damnation encompassed by a weird kind of 'certainty dominance' ... its weird and makes me feel uncomfortable. That aside, on melting into the core of my understanding about it I could draw a comparison to my current mental state; And recall that I was ascertained in that this part of me would never get lost. Back to now}. From the contemporary/outside stance however it is better to talk about it as the Force. Deeper within Force and Light are perfectly interchangable ... errr ... not ... ? Well - it is as with matter and atoms or molecules ... or maybe Light and Electromagnetic Waves. In this sense, sure - it locks. Light is what ends up mattering to us, while the Electromagnetic Spectrum is its entirety that matters in many different ways. So the woosh is an introductary part of the whole, where yea - essentially the Light:Spectrum relation is getting inversed. So while the physical Light is smaller ... err. The Force ... comes in, and this is in and of itself an experience that does in-deed come within its Form ... and over the course of time a general sense of it settles down. It shows itself as in unity with everything around, while being still kindof distant. This in deed compares well to snow - in that now over time more and more Light settles within the cognitive spaces. Most dominantly were the representation of the 3 Principles, 4 Lights and 12 Aeons ... that so due to their part in the 'Form' of Unification.

The Force will throughout all this appear in many different ways - constituting a variety of stuff while seemlessly transitioning from one X into the other. What a lazy transcription. Crude. But OK, without any real concept of what this constitutes into there isn't a real point anyway.
Reflecting of this Crudeness is now no deeper meaning. So - what it 'constitutes' into will be transcribed at some point - but then may not be much different from how it is happening now or at any point in time respectively. So there is a depth - and its absence begs the question: Why?

It would be a challenge to write some Volume to just see ... how far we can go; And to move on from there. In the beginning it amounts to an intro and basic knowledges, thereafter to a collection of samples that can be taken into considerations and thereafter just a curiosity such as the oomp-teen-giga-bazillionth digit of Pi.

What matters now is that therein some experience of familiarity with something yet elusive emerges, and it settles around this ... "curiosity" that we now call Light. We had to describe it as something that is within us capable of creating environments invisible to these earthly planes of existence/reality. Its effects however ... happen through those it shines within; Such as by myself.

"So" - if you wanted a Laser Show you'd have to watch some Movie ... or take some Drugs. ^^ Certain Doses of Weed ... might be good for everybody.

"I dream of Spaceships with Ganja Symbols on them".


Red-Yellow-Green

Now is this not the main point. This now is basically a "realm" of its own. Lets call it 'the phase of Growth'. Within this now, to me at least and if you go by this ... evenly so, there is the concept of some emergence of some society via some kind of streams. A Mystery similar to the "next Step" of becoming this mysterious Form of ... 'Self-Become' for lack of a better word. Self-becomen?
Allogenes. Lets stick to that. TO become 'an' Allogenes. It seems inconceivable however. Now, how to become an Allogenes? Perhaps that constitutes into: Find your Clarity.


But now are these things merely concepts; And something like an Antenna - ... hmm. It seems like I have to be a bit older to get this right, ... but no. More like TV ... yes. God so has things He can show you ... and ... getting to know God is well ... overwhelming; But what you would imagine as a really overwhelming, positive experience is hereby stretched along many years and really really not all that emotional. Nothing outside of the ordinary and therefore here and then exception.

Now have I so been guided to this point - and when it gets to the things that I end up disliking about this guy, ... I do sense something as an overlay on top of the different video thumbnails on YouTube. These things now are coming in at some point ... but they don't 'plop' in out of nowhere. What Unification with God feels like is as though ... eternity had inscribed its entirety into you. But not like in Stargate whith that Ancient device that got O'Neills mind grilled, TWICE, ... although ... the effects can be compared. Its like with these Mandelbrot Set visualizations. Or to take it further back - with the individual numbers that go into the equasion. I would though stress that it also is less fancy than it sounds. Thats what it means when I say that it is not quite like in Stargate. This contrast however between absolutely knowing that I have no clue and now seeing those things I had no clue about - it shows me ... it feels like they have been there all along nonetheless. Minor Detail.
{Wanna compare dicks again?}

{LOL. Imagine a dude sitting on a rocket, and now let the rocket be his dick}

Dick Joke by God! There you go.


This should however also say that - once you get to visualize certain things out of curiosity - thats what I did - thats not quite it. I don't know. Maybe people can be trained ... or there could be some ... general protocol of some sort to speed this or that up a little. So well, anyhow. These streams now however ... yea, they come in at a certain density Level. Effectively. Yea. So it takes time for that mass to build up.

And that is what I'm speaking of - and I can't fully make sense of it yet. So I get different feelings about different things - and one individual I'm generally fully on board with was Jim Sterling. Or "have been", lets settle it that way. Then there is Thunderf00t. Total Biscuit - sure. I mean, now that I have to look at it this way ... the thing is that I haven't watched much of his recent stuff. So - he's from "back in the days" - in my memory. But sure - he ... doesn't quite put all that much out anymore. When it gets to Undoomed there is less of a surface area to speak of. But he's a Stargate fan. "It seems". I see that as something of a Fuck You mixed with a badge and and an FYI. It does serve all three. A Fuck You at all those "progressives" and "pro diversity" people that know nothing about Stargate, a badge as in regards to establishing an individualistic association to the Franchise and an FYI alias shoutout to all the Stargate fans.

Maybe it'll be good!

Kyle Kulinsky and TJ with their disagreements are also somehow off-sync with me - which most possibly is due to the nature of the matters that are being discussed. But back to Jim. Thinking of a particular game as possibly triggered by the thumbnail gives me a particular feeling. When I then watch the Video, I generally experience consensus with the things that are being said and those validate the feelings I had earlier. This is however something of a controversial subject. Is it now a foreshadowing, or is it a consensus around certain things perpetuated by a Godly stance to it? So when I get to think of the recent Lord of the Rings game/dreck/debacle - (sorry, LOTR is cool, by dreck I just generally refer to the 'dreck' that is coming out and is apparent to be 'dreck') - the situation is clearly that this type of putting Microtransactions into a game is offensive. So I get a negative feeling about this game, watch the Video, am being told what ... and fully agree with it.
But I'm still not sure ... what it is.
The situation examplified here is however pretty simple. Its ... simple in terms of ... objectiveness. A game is relatively static in its existence over time because it always exists within the confines of its programming and contemporary hardware. Hmm. So - however one now were to report about the game ... weird. I think ... there then is some other feeling. Whatever. Or, hmm ... well. Thunderf00ts videos in comparison ... they do seem a little odd. They ... "mirror" a lot of despise, simply put. Urr ... LOTR game. So, Microtransactions suck! Well - thats a thing of its own. This topic to my awareness contains something of a pickle - some forceful drive ... as many put it: A fierce desire to put Microtransactions into gaming/shoving 'em down our throat. Is that now due to the reporting, that this is my impression, so ... is it Jinx ..., or is it not? If you can't relate to any of that, its the latter.

But then the facts stand on their own. When it gets to Destiny 2 its not that bad. Its done responsibly. Yea sure, its a Loot Addiction game ... but ... Loot = Accomplishment. Nothing left to Loot = done with the game. If you want to stick around for long enough. Good? Bad? How ... does it all start?
There is one Meme that puts it really well. Games in the Past: Mona Lisa plus Hamburger. Games now: Mona Lisa in pieces plus DLC.

Its something I have been worried about since ... well ... games began to be attached to the internet. So there then usually were those that proclaimed doom and terror and those that defended it. And more and more defenders of hope have since had to change the side. And its a fact. I mean, just look at it. That game. Loot Boxes in your face. Or is that ... inaccurate reporting? Should I buy it to find out?
Destiny 2 sure might go down the sink. It doesn't look too promising yet; But ... somehow optimistic. Uh, ... first I knew I'd buy into it, then I got a little bit skeptic, ... hmm. Whatever. Loot Boxes. What is right, what is wrong? Some say its fine, others think its not. And who really can tell?

I myself however try to stay the hell away from them. I really don't like the idea that once I'm purchasing a game, that purchase wasn't the end of it. I mean, its a calculated risk to be honest. And maybe there is a bit of naughtiness behind the attitude of not wanting to pay anything extra for some amount of enjoyment; Where thinking of World of Warcraft the subscription model comes to mind as an instance where this is limitted by time - justifiable through the cost of the online systems that can be maintained for as long as it can be payed for.
And ... lets take money out of the picture. So by just assuming that every player gets infinite ... "premium currency". Well, would it break Destiny 2? No! Although it would give a player some edge for some time where Mods are yet scarce - as anyone else is bound to Glimmer limitations. ... 4 Mods an hour ... plus all the extra stuff from random loot drops. 2 Mods from a 200 silver engram - thats 100 silver per mod. 500 Silver amount to 5 euros, which is ... 1 mod per euro at its most expensive. Hmm ... Plus a lot of Golddust from disassembling all the unwanted stuff ... one would easily drown in in game nonsense.
Which is what it is. Nonsense. I'm drowning in that nonsense and I didn't even buy any premium stuff - except for stuff bought with Golddust earned through in-game activities.
A lot of money wouldn't really change the game fundamentally. So, by flipping the "its free" switch the game is pretty much unharmed.

Does that now make Battlefront 2 good? Well - kindof. At least in regards to a future where that flip is being switched. Once that flitch is swipped and a game however breaks ... that is then most certainly a game that doesn't really ... "belong". But so, what am I upset about? I would say that it is the state of the world. I kindof have to laugh about it.


But ... wow. How did I get here. Woozy. This Jeff dude now, the first thing I saw of him was on Star Trek Discovery. And he captured me as a really fascinating guy to listen to. So my impression of the show is primed by his take on it; And as a Trekkie I feel addressed - as, he puts forward a few concerns that I see I would be concerned about too. Not all of them. That is - I'm ... not really a huge Trek nerd. I mean - I safely haven't seen all Episodes of all Shows yet. The only show I've thoroughly watched is Voyager. And at that time - yea, it was good. Its the perfect show to zoom out a little. You know - taking that little trip through the Delta Quadrant. Works more than once!
Eventually it gets old - but - if you need extra-time, I mean ... Stargate ... works too! 17 seasons worth. Yea, I liked the show although some actors didn't really vibe well at first. This ... however well reflected their Characters in the show - so - it was after all a really cool trip! But its disappointingly short - so - 15 seasons safe! OK, maybe 10 if you skip the first 5 seasons of Stargate. That next to 7, well, for me it were 5 or 6, Seasons of Voyager. And ... Sanctuary was pretty straight too. Maybe ... well, I mean, I would still recommend it. And also for some zooming out. This are 5 Seasons ... and welll, is kindof trashy. But the Character Development is really really good! Epic!

But I couldn't tell you the ending of DS9, last thing I remember is really digging the Defiant and Worf as its Captain, but ... that had to be refreshed. Some dude lendt me his DVDs but my Laptop wouldn't play it. Just a few of them. So I got up to the point where - ... Cisco starts to have his prophetic confusion - and something about Worf avenging Dex.
TNG and the Originals are semi-familiar to me. Most of these holes come down to time. Star Trek is ... it was always there somehow. I enjoyed it as a Kid although I barely had the chance to really see it. I only remember one Episode. That with the Silicon lifeform. Oh, now the Klingons come to mind. I however also studied some side-material. That means, there was a Magazine that had blueprints and cards on different things, like a Database updated monthly. I'm familiar with the franchise.

So however - some of the things these Trekkies address aren't things I would have noticed - but whenever they do mention something that I would have noticed, the response within me is practically identical and irrefutable. And people that can tell me about Star Trek do generally have my respect. A pros pos. My favourte Star Trek Character: Hard to say. Its perhaps a mood thing. And challenging. When asking these questions myself I usually realize that I can't really tell. It would depend on my contemporary awareness. When it gets to Stargate for instance I've been pretty much set on Princess Harmony - #EpicMacGyverReference - but when being serious - well, they're pretty much all cool! The least of them ... maybe Kellar because she came in last or ... f*** ... Szelenka ... ??? Zelenka? /// because of his role - its hard to dismiss any of them. But - then would still go with Ronon more profoundly followed by Teal'C - and well, Daniel just adds a really epic Fantasy flair to it; And then I really can't stop. Weir, McKay, Teyla, Tod, Jack, Samantha, Hammond, Landry, ... whatshisname ... and so on and so on. I'm weird. I might go with Tod for second. So here again a shift occured. From Teal'C to Tod - and when in the Teal'C mood there's also Tomin. And depending on my mood, I don't know! I mean - if my cognitive curiosities aligned with Tomins story, I might favour him as I then also had a story to tell. And maybe - we tend to like whom we identify with.
In regards to Star Trek I now know that I once had it ... and I had this situation that it wasn't Seven of Nine, and I was weirdly confused. Like now that I think about it I think about Seven and I know it isn't her but I don't know who else it might be. There is the Doctor, Kes, Janeway, ... but those aren't either. For a long time it used to be Riker. ... those were darker times. ^^. ... //
But yea, he holds up. "The Riker Maneuver" rocks - a.k.a. the Riker way of sitting down. Crusher, Wesley, ... Picard. Those are all Characters with stories that either entertain or have something to say. They have their own Characters - and this is how extreme neutrality looks like I guess. But I also really dig the story of Quarks Son. What Discovery gives me ... well, is as put: Pew Pew instead of reason. What could the first few episodes could have been like? We get a brighter Deck, the protagonist doesn't screw up and we forward into a future where she had been promoted to Captain. Maybe the show will turn out to be interesting - and similar shit I could also say about Star Wars. Suggesting some Character Development like OMG Rey is the Force incarnate or something - but maybe more interesting - like, we've seen before. Torres comes to mind. Do the Klingons line up with what we see there? Hmm ... I should probably shut up because I ain't even remotely interested in it.

Except well - "yet another thing bites the dust". Its a show set on self-destruct, what can I say? Or what else should I see? As I see it, fans are disappointed and the only redeeming factor is that it 'might' become good 'eventually'. Opposed by: transdimensional dissonance. It doesn't work. That ... doesn't look pretty. You can usually watch Star Trek and "feel" their synergy. So ... some writer came up with the Holodeck and 'bam' ... it got invented between prior and then. From modern perspective that might not make sense - considering we already created Holographic projections - but wouldn't it so be extra cheesy, something as an easter egg, to yet maintain that idea?

I would anyhow try to be cheesy as fuck when it gets to representing the 60s style. Not in a funky way to mimic the 60s, but in a way that ... works with contemporary and serious. So as for the Klingons, I might prefer a less extreme divergence from humanoid. Like Vulcans they should sortof be able to blend in. Maybe some ridges to emphasize certain outlines - sortof shallow like only color but still not only color. Some blend between eastern and Rasta - perhaps with a Lion-y vibe to kindof hint towards the TNG Klingons and embuing them with Fighting Spirit. It generally wouldn't hurt to retcon Klingon history a little - but all that ultimately matters is that it still blends in. So there has to be some sense of Evolution - to which the Klingons as of the Original Series are to be a functional Link. Textbooks can be rewritten.
So I would go for a more primitive form of Klingon - but that, ... well, emphasized within some social dysfunction that makes them internally racist alias "animalic", which gives them some sortof distrust that fits into something sleezy. Take a snake crossed with an eel ... maybe. Fiendish. Yet with enough "depth" that mirrors their status as Warp-capable civilization. This could further set precedent for a future show to eventually further deepen the diplomatic evolution between Humans and Klingons. The child of Paris and Torres should certainly not be discarded. An idea would be that this incident that changed their appearance had some cultural impact whereby they sortof got to shed their ignorance - so, may it be through punishment or humiliation or something - so however leaving the race with a deep sense of honor that now began to embrace the rest of their neighbourhood.

[... spoilers? ... I had some ...]

As for the Vulcans I would keep a red-ish planet while taking some purple next to gold aligned bright contrasts to the surface taken into some contemporary art architecture in form of huge structures as grown into the planet. I would want to develop this species further into something of a technocracy, trying to explain how they themselves explored their tech underground through some type of clergy within, that since ever had kept sciences as their traditions.

A ship I really would want to see ... well, that gives it away. But sure. The USS Gaia/Phoenix/[...], co-developped by Seven of Nine.

Admiral ... maybe. Well, there is still this issue. Have the Borg been defeated? What are the Borg? What is species ... thing, ... numbers. 247...6? 9? ... 27... 72 ...? X72X? ... blrp. We first have a stage where the galaxy gets smaller, the immediate neighbourhood is further out - where, we can either keep it at that for a while or boost straight into inter-galactic diplomacy on a broad scale.


So, with this being Sci-Fi as it is now, let me spark that, we can look ahead. As we take it further into space - we have to wonder: How? In Star Trek we know of Zephram, who in some desolate nothing invented the Warp Drive and then a benevolent species came in to save us from our own ignorance. This is a really depressing and really optimistic outlook at once. What if we don't run accross a friendly species? And come crawling forth from shambles? And then, what do we want to be when we make contact to another intelligent species? Do we want to be Ferrengi? Or Cardassians? Maybe the Kaeson? Or maybe ... getting assimilated by Nanoparticles programmed to obey one Mastermind?
It is a real question 'right now'. How we manage our ressources in these "critical days" - consolidating a foundation for the future.


The Vulcans make a great example by being an overdrawn example of what is good and rational. They are overdrawn to a point where we get to a good percentage of people that is alienated by their nature, responding to a human core, and make space for charismatic, or ... individualistically exceptional, ... people with character, ... to take a step forward taking the lead.

As of our emancipation standards we can then also project esoteric items into the mix ... etc..


- err. So - to get back to the point ... what I dislike about him, well ... that ... feeling ... it got later substanciated as I so learned more about his social background. Not disagreeing with his positions at all, but so - ... here's the thing with the Armoured Skeptic: He likes/liked Star Wars 7. And that is the real issue there. Its a separate issue. However the case - its a simple argument to make. He simply is differently aligned than I am. And certain fluxes of dissonance exist everywhere. That sortof makes up some individuals signature, or fingerprint. This dissonance lets me feel him as some extremely left leaning guy who takes ideologies really seriously. The dissonance however isn't within the values. Its simply emotional, indicative of some, well - given distance or difference in terms of how we operate or function in society.

Star Wars 7 ... I ... can't sympathize with Disneys cannibalization of its spirit. Neither can I with anyone who does. There just is some cultural disconnect while I would blame the other side more for the faults of the Prequels than Lucas. What I mean is some ... creative vibe ... I don't know. I want to take Lucas into defense too much; But this whole thing just feels like a horrible devorce. And the faulty side is ... "Pew Pew".

"Pew Pew" - the scourge of contemporary media. Or, its left hand maybe. The other one is fake news, and its head false conspiracy theory. Its belly is ill social justice, and its legs ... it maybe needs no legs. Just a trail of smoke representing the many forms of misinformation; Of which we want to reserve some space for Entertainment.


Porn? Well - you know my thing, so ... ...

Am I thinking right? Again? ... so, what am I triggered by now? Black Screen? Or some flashes of porn some 20 minutes ago? No, it came fluently. Seems as though the "projected best habit" would have worked out just fine. Oh yea. There goes that. Hmm ... Maybe?


My hope for Media is that we will learn to deal with it responsibly. One pillar of which is the empowerment of talented artists. Idealistically every artist should be empowered - and still ... art ... can it ultimately be described? Or captured? Comprehended?
Isn't art at some point ... evasive by nature? That were however one property that allowed it to forever amaze us!

If we try to be too logical about it we might get to a point of being unable to answer the questions for how now individualistic expressions ... I mean. By lifting the educational entry Level you block out everyone who may happen to have more real life experience. Eventually there is one with passion and fortune that made it - "and its a tough business, whaddayaknow?" - some serious money too! Oh yea, by the way: Videogames.

I could go on and scheme about society, trying to draw out some Utopia - yet at the base the magic to me is all about Unification. And I - do now feel compelled to write about Satanism.//22:45



But OK. Lets say Jeff is a Douche. I mean - I've been watching the "Steve Virtue Signalling Shives dances around islam" video - and while Jeff has a point on top of it all that I quite agree with, I mean ... he's also a bit of a douche there so lets just stick to it. Lets just fuck nuance as well. Take it, strap it to the wooden horse and have it backwards. So, then there is this other video where he and his wife bash on some feminist - and OK, let me just say, then - well, OK! I'm a Feminist! That didn't hurt!

So, what now? Now I have to stand up and represent! OK, I ... might get me a T-shirt that signals to everyone that 'hey' - I'm a feminist. But what does Feminist mean? I mean - what do I expect now from wearing such a T-Shirt? I'd think of some dude or friend getting up to me and looking at it and going like "Whaat?". So I got to say: "No dear brassa, you are mistaken! Feminism is just another word for Gender Equality!". What could I expect other than a really really weird look on his face mixed with some "Sure! Whatever dude"?

I could think of me standing there in some highly populated shopping street with the word 'Feminist' all over my chest; And what would I say? I mean - I were as a poster wall - and people looking at me ... I don't know! I however have a hard time believing that there is some dude going like: "Hmm, what an interesting chap! he sure doesn't seem like the ordinary and I wonder what nuanced perception he has of feminism" - a harder time than thinking of someone just looking at it, associating it to what he implies ... and is that of course the problem?


Well, the first thing I think about when I think about Feminism is Marcy Darcy. And the next thing thereafter is No Ma'am. Hmm ... is that internalized mysogeny?

I mean, what a weak statement is 'Feminist!'? ... I realize that some people have a hard time wrapping their head around this. So, jokes aside - what is the true meaning of the word "Madriganjula"? I have to think about that one Stargate episode where this fish creature captures Daniel Jackson to translate some ancient babylonian writing because it should somehow contain information about the whereabouts of his wife. Jackson however knows ... Jackshit. And the fishguy continues to say the same phrase over and over again. It contains the answer, but ... "Which fate Omorokka?" ... and Daniel is like ... "woot?". This exchange between them really focusses on the emotional pressures behind just not knowing what to make of certain words. They tried! Daniel tried! The viewer tries! "Which fate Omorokka?". Whaaat?
Arcane is a better word then. "Arcane" sounds cool - and it gets even cooler if you know what it means!

Then tere are other words like 'Truckdriver'. When I hear the word 'Truckdriver' I immediately know what to think about. Might be a Stereotype - but sorry - it is one word and I only need one picture to ... have an idea ... so, there are going to be some heavy tropes in that image. Well, I loved Smokey and the Bandit as a child ... so, ... accurate or not. I'd argue its good enough.
Now 'Feminist' doesn't pronounce Gender Equality as much as 'Gender Equality'. And this is where the crux is at. If I extended the T-Shirt saying: "I'm a Feminist" followed by the dicitionary definition in the style of a dictionary entry ... thats different. But then there's still the "I'm a Feminist" part ... the term 'Feminist' ... that needs me to ask the question: Why? What? How?

If I had to design me a T-Shirt based on the poster-wall concept to say something - there'd possibly be a lot of religious symbols on there, from a variety of religions, but still a big fat Gothic style Christian Cross. So, not the 'plus', but the proper one, with the circle and beads - and maybe some more feminine tribalesque deco-shit around it. And anyone who'd look at it and be intrigued by it would get what they saw - a Christian unlike anyone they ever met. Which ... OK. I mean ... its always interesting to be challenged by people who think they know their shit better. And ultimately I know there is so much stuff that I'd come to not talk about - these conversations are boldly philosophical and I know that for as long as I can't really bring up any of the more serious stuff its going to be just that. But this is still my identity. I'm a Christian. I'm not hiding it. I'm open about it. And had some great conversations around it.
Now, the Bible may not be inherantly emancipated - but it is sortof emancipated in its own weird way. You might say that these are just role models for young girls to aspire - ... and yea, we can easily slip down a steep slope into some dark abyss there. Like, where do the Whores come in? How does that affect a young mind? How does the churches 'anti whore' stance influence this?
But I'm not a ... "Bible-ist". I'm Gnostic - and one of the Gnostic writings (quoted in the movie Stigmata) is anti Church while Gnosticism all in all, yea, it sure is kindof heretic. Anti-Bible? Well ... thats difficult. The Gnostic stance on Gods perfection is ... weird. Its ... paradoxic. The paradoxon is as within math. You can't really add any number to infinity - infinity is always its own inconceivable, paradoxic thing that cannot really be combined with the 'imperfect' (numbers) in a seriously meaningful way. What is infinity minus anything? Or plus? Any way - infinity ... is however responsible for any numbers there to be. I mean, what if there were some largest number? Multiply it by 2 and ... ? What? Judgement Day?
So, we 'can' take the Bible and wonder: OK, what if we just ... went ... emancipated? I mean, eventually we're talking about Adultery, Groupsex, Anal Intercourse and what not - so, Emancipation isn't all that weird!
So I might also slap a "Plus Gender Equality" on that T-shirt and ... to say: Christianity to me includes Gender Equality. "Within Certain margins" - possibly to be determined on a case by case basis. But equal enough for a man to actually be beneath a woman. There's a huge spectrum of stuff. But sure - for - general, simple, fucks and sakes - there is no way around it. Emancipation is good and right!
To now just say: Gender Equality is something within a variety of umbrella terms. Feminism so just happens to be one of them. Maybe even the original one. Some years ago I could totally see why I might want to wear a 'Feminist' T-Shirt. ... Decades rather.
Maybe even a Century. I'm not too familiar with the history.

Now, what I'm concerned about are the consequences of me identifying myself as Feminist. The problem there is that I see Feminists being in for a variety of stuff that I don't necessarily find myself on board with. Am I on board with Gender Equality? Sure! Maybe even rather Gender agnosticism. I'm a dude, I'm into women - yet somehow in my twisted head I'm the female and she's the male.


Urr ... to come back to the initial jokings. The thing I'm trying to digest there is the road I see ahead of me. More specifically: The purpose of adding the term 'Feminist' to my deck. Does it lead to what I want? Does it provoke the things I want to provoke? I mean - what the term 'Feminist' most dominantly stands for is the idea that women are being oppressed and need our support. What some say it stands for is: "I'm a dude willing to bend over for Sex!" (But I'm not sure if I'm interested!).


But jokes aside. The actually serious tell of the story is what it now had to mean - for me - to be a feminist. If all that feminism stands for and is about is gender equality, then sure - I'm a feminist. I'm also a Muslim. I mean, I even tried it for some time to 'actually' and 'actively' refer to myself as Muslim. Some where like "Whaat?" and that gave me the chance to explain. "I believe in Allah and Abraham and Isaac and Jacob" OK "Jesus and Moses" Good "and the Prophets" - cool, I'm in! But then some had to say: "But thats not really Islam!". Well, I can make it so. I can take the Quran, take that Verse, say I'm a Muslim - and bam - new Religion founded. I can say I'm a Jew because Jesus was a Jew and by being Baptised I'm reborn in his name. So - ... technically.
For Buddhism - tss - I'm Enlightened - I 'am' Buddha (a) - so of course I'm a Buddhist - what silly a question!.
Making myself a Hindu is going to be a bit more Complicated. We could start with Prana, which is a concept I can dig, but so I'd rather be a Daoist of that. Shiva and Jesus ... return of Christ, Judgement Day, ... I even believe in rebirth ... so - well, it doesn't work ultimately because Hinduism is rather defined through specific dieties; But if we can work out a base where we regard those as symbols and rather take the spiritual whole then Hinduism isn't too different from Christianity either!

I can sure also sit down next to an Erich van Daeneken - I mean ... sortof. UFOs, sure! We would certain clash on certain topics; But once sitting down there he kindof had the cheatcodes to my position if he payed any attention. I mean - because of the Babel issue I can't really say anything against the whole Annunaki thing. I wouldn't say that I'm totally on board with it all, so I guess I'd have to leave the Panel after all - or maybe not because I do think that there is in deed some mystique to it that I however can't discard for myself.
I can add my own bullshit if we're taking it that way. Like some of the people of babel got shipped to the Americas - why not ship some of them to the stars? And because the whole thing also includes a huge time-gap, it might also be billions of years more. Maybe we all once were part of an alien civilization that is now long time extinct?
Dodgy, iffy, ... I guess I rather stay out of this - though I just wanted to throw in that anything relating to UFOs ... Alien Species and such ... I don't know and anything that would suggest there are ... is well, interesting!
So - I kindof believe in UFOs though. Aliens and that shit. It wouldn't surprise me all that much.

I don't know much of Shinto - but I'm sure there's some way. And yea - Atheism! Totally! Kindof.


What I'm 'suggesting' here is that once you label yourself with something, you kindof 'should' understand what it means. Or implies. What it does. And that is a smartass stance to take! By which I mean: I see that its rather easy to turn out like an asshole. Its a little condescending in that it is a situation that often can only exist 'after' some form of enlightenment or epiphany; While otherwise we're simply down with our beliefs and glad about a ship that carries these.

But its still an "ultimate position" - a.k.a. - well, something that ends up being the 'good advise' in response to a lot of ... stupid shit. A.k.a.: What people would end up concluding after some rollercoaster ride of life. Its however not easy to see how other people look at you. I happen to be underweight - and I don't notice that in the mirror. (45 kg on 183 cm). I also have been told that I smell because ... well ... laziness. I have reasons to suggest; can tell myself that taking a shower more often would be as being on the safe side but then forget about it anyway. So we don't always know when we're being obnoxious or stupid.

As for being a feminist; What I can do is speak out against someone who just so happens to be a mysogenistic asshole - and if that makes me a feminist, fine! But I don't need to identify myself as a feminist to do that! There are other things that come first.


What I'm saying basically means that I 'fear' that once I were a feminist, it would go a bit further than just being pro gender equality. It goes into into acknowledging what the majority of feminists think being 'pro gender equality' is about. I'm not forced to - I can invent my own self and contribute to the whole; While at any rate my efforts would follow the 'Feminist' banner, a.k.a.: My main belief were that we/I needed to fight for gender equality; From a perspective of the oppressed woman. What I however believe is more important is to now take a few steps back even and to acknowledge gender differences. This is to me as a trans-person smoehow, well, important ... ??? If there were no difference; There wouldn't be much of an issue. Its not a politically versed issue though. It goes on to however rather say that I am to be opposed to a too broad generalization of gender equality.

In germany the word 'emancipation' is the base for a condescending term for woman. So a "Emanze" is to basically label a woman that is, well, overly keen or eager to basically ... interfere into male habits and make a huge deal out of it. So, your "average" Marcy Darcy - basically. May have been that era too. And there so also goes that Married with Children type of anti feminist mood - with Al Bundy being the stereotypical male that just can't handle all that 'progress'. And so 'men' like to humor this further by drawing exaggerated pictures of what they conclude the consequences of this movement would be. So we see a lot of 'serious' images that generally draw the modern man as doing the house-work and the modern woman as being a successful business person. Men - so it seems - often have no other escape after all that but to say something about their balls and scissors or cutting ... and off.
TJ Kirk self chastising himself for being a white male comes to mind.

But you have to understand the 'male' in this regard. Maybe. There however is the issue of 'doing'. What 'more' can I 'do' to 'myself' to be found adequate? This is however from men that are already trying. I would argue that this is an instance of mislabeling. The man there regards himself as not feminist, while he could call himself a feminist and be over it. But there goes the problem with identity politics. What do feminists do? Where does the energy go? Can I identify with that?

Some people generally worry that identifying with an idea or movement of that sort - Thunderf00t made some stuff about it (Sargon of Akkad controversy) - will eventually become something totally different. I do nonetheless call myself a Christian; Although that basically also could lead to a lot of misconceptions about what I believe in.


18:36[things like this: I don't have much time, going to see Blade Runner later this evening, wanted to take a shower, shower is blocked. Shit like this happens so often to me. Fortunate and Unfortunate]


01:38

Mjolnyr

What a great film! I think this is one of the best picks when trying to make an objective argument on what good or bad movies are! And on that note I'd right away go and compare it to Ghost in the Shell - which I basically like more, ... which is sortof a visuals vs. cinematography kindof issue. Or maybe accessibility of the content and the relevance thereof. Not saying that Ghost in the Shells accessibility/relevance (makes it/)is uber special (it in deed is more of a watered down version of the Anime but also more of its own thing in that regard that to me makes a great 'addition' rather than just 'equals') ... but err - before I'm getting lost in there; Comparing the two lends itself to me because of their visual similarities though Blade Runner sortof does it all way much better.

Weird.

I'm yet again pissed off by Jim Sterling who yet again can't keep his mouth shut about Destiny 2 ... but that isn't the reason. I mean, it maybe does suck a little but ... loot boxes. I almost wouldn't have watched his recent video ... something along the lines of "turning players into payers" - by which I mean to throw back to the "is it jinx?" question. It would seem that way. The first impression I had was "Oh no, yet another Microtransactions story"; Which of course it was as indicated by the thumbnail and name - so, maybe not a lot of supernatural stuff going on there. The moment you think you've heard and seen it all, well, it seems like there's always more just around the corner. And I'm unhappy. But again I pretty much thought like Jim - as, ... I previously dropped it on a note of calling it funny - and part of this 'funny' is that I don't really think this will last! I think we look at it, tell ourselves: "How stupid!" - as we don't see how this can really find widespread acceptance!

But it gets worse. The biggest problem these days I think is China. There is this ... thing ... some, ... sense of China gaining more and more influence as becoming more and more daring. Perhaps all of that is just the buildup to some expected upcoming crisis/ressource shortage; Leaders are starting panic, rich folks are starting to hoard and those with positions of power are trying to get into good starting positions. A lot of things that Trump has down is 'war signalling' - as for instance lowering environmental protection and increasing military spending. What pisses me the most about it is that I can't do anything, it makes me wonder what my purpose is. So mayhap it isn't all like that. I otherwise supposed that Trump/XXXXX misjudged the sentiment of people, his warmongering flopped - and china ... is much as North Korea a vacuum - and you need thick walls to hold a large vacuum!


//02:04!02:39//I really was about to sleep, but then I had some thoughts on Islam - and some other stuff; And then I just couldn't hold my piss anymore. Well - at least I decided to not find out just how long I could hold it.
Now - one of the things ... well, should also finally eject some greater sense into the whole SJW vs Anti-SJW nonsense - so I'll probably start with that.




The basic thought itself is triggered by reason. Now I 'think' ... that I will 'love' having Monica around me. What makes me think that? Lets call them 'reasons'. reasons trigger thoughts. Once reason is procreated by thought, that reason is weaker than a reason not procreated by thought. So, if I slap you in the face that reason is stronger than if you imagine me slapping you in the face.

I would write about Islam separately, but ... I feel like I don't have to. Hmm ... now I get it. That weird flapping around with arms and legs to somehow move forward; I experience that right now. I've had thoughts and now that it comes to writing them out I skip over half of the stuff, sortof ... not finding the words to express because maybe I'm in too much haste and so on the long run I'm not getting anywhere.


So I prefer not to take any breaks. I prefer to have a clear cognitive start and just get going to some end. One of the reasons why I went to bed was because the burger from McDonalds was still sitting sideways in my stomach; But now its actually gone. Now that is closer to the full thought - uh, leading up to me then noticing that I'm sure I'll enjoy having Monica around.
What made me think that? Good question! I think it was an appearance in the mind that I experienced through some feeling of love and care lurking behind a really friendly face! Then thinking that I would love her to be around made her ask the question what makes me sure about it; And I had to think about how much deeper clarity goes.

I got to note though: Its not always that clear. Maybe I'm just too used to the Light by now - but in the whole there are clear ties into the infinite.

Oh, really? Is this what it is about? Like, who is "Monica"? Really, like - huhmm.


Anyhow. Lets set this straight. To get back to the beginning of where this chain of reasoning began: I so was lying there and had to think about explaining myself to a psychiatrist. I was at that set into a certain mode of concerns and as of that had to get/sit up (in my imagination) - take a deep breath and try to speak out honest, assuming I could 'help her out' with my own reasoning about whats going on ... I mean ... taking a more authoritative stance. So, basically just "explain this and that" in my imagination in a fictional environment with a fictional counterpart.

Trying to be open.

Or straight. Or ... honest.

Thats the issue. How honest can I be? I had to think about the many conversations I had along the time, round about God - and had to rationalize that none of these conversations really had the same content. Then on further looking at it, I realized that there in deed are certain re-occuring topics, like God, ... and then I was fascinated to think about it in a more general context, I mean, I wanted to further elaborate my standpoint by making an example of ... assuming two christians of a different belief system in a conversation with each other. The one will try to pull the other one over to his side; And both have their confessions that they try to explain to the other. Next I needed to speak about "the fallacy" - and the next best thing that came to mind was that interview between Cenk Uygur and ... Sam ? Harris? That ... I had it previously. The first thing to note is that although Cenk called Sam 'Scam' on one show, both could yet come together, sit down and have a civilized discussion. The first point I want to bring up is a point that Cenk then delivered to Sam right away at the beginning - doing so as initiator of the discussion and host of the platform. He said that in most of the points that Sam is talking/writing about he agrees with him. Whats the number? 90 to 95 percent? Well - so we can now establish that both of them have a nearly identical ideology. So we can for this example take one ideology, copy it, distribute it amongst two people - and now we only need to add some discrepancy; Where Islam just so happens to be a hot topic which adds some "stakes" to it.
Which is why this discrepancy basically 'blew up' or is so dense.

Then, I don't remember exactly how - this item came up. We have to see that Islam is at war with itself, ... uh, rewind. First: Agreement and Disagreement. Thats the whole issue there. Thats the one thing that can be said about Islam at this point which is most definitely and absolutistically correct. Agreement and Disagreement is the problem. So, Muslims are at war with Muslims. But no! To be "politically correct" we have to say: real Muslims are at war with fake Muslims. But to be 100% accurate we have to say that until there is one unchallenged true Islam - there are no real Muslims to speak of!


Now, what was the point I was trying to make in first place? I would say, well, it has been oozing in a little a bit earlier already. The issue ... of how honest to ourselves we can be. So the thing about my favourite Star Trek Character. Or Stargate. Why? I don't know.


//03:12


I guess this goes to say that we aren't robots and that life happens as it happens.

But for now I'm going to write some more about Video Games. ... Darkside Royalty Lore is a Destiny content creator I first noticed leading up to Destiny 2 and he's generally positively negative about the game. Another dude I basically do get on board with. Do I agree with him? I don't think that is the right term here.

The first thing I would rather note is that he is one of those dudes that reminds us to and how not to be douchebags. Sortof. Uh, what are 'allures'? We so basically know the picture of a star who's told that he/she is all great by the people around him/her - and the star sortof looses the sight for realism. Well, sometimes things are complicated!
What I mean is that there are things I enjoy Destiny 2 for - while there are things other people dislike Destiny 2 for. And thats OK! Each of us is differently invested. I am a person that enjoyed Destiny for what it was - I was on board with it and willing to go with it for various reasons, the social aspect being one of them. Its a Multiplayer game and so it stands that there is this arbitrary figure of people who like and want that about Destiny, so we have a 'real' and 'legitimate' interest in the game performing well. There is however more than just that group that has 'some' interest into the game performing good or bad.
So people like me however then get into the game and want to have fun. The game feels good, ... stuff and stuff. Positive impressions. Yea. Eventually the bling bling gets annoying. Kindof. This ... is once again ... having forgotten a few steps along the way.

Introducing Underdog YouTuber StonefoxMedia. I first stumbled upon him during the XBone debacle vs Sony issue. He now then made a video about him being done with Destiny 2. And in our Clan and for me - the air is similarly gone. Thats just fact. How it is. Thats free of any oppinion. I for myself do feel something of a general fatigue, some form of tiredness or fed-up-ness; And now I have a clearer image of what bugs me about Destiny 2.
So, talking about the Weapons and the whole intrinsic Perk system. I first was OK with it. I kindof liked it. I liked the idea of having a good weapon right out of the Box (Well, in that regard I can't really complain about Destiny 1 because I generally had decent rools! I mean ... I didn't have the Imago Loop with Explosives AND Firefly, but I then had the Iron Banner handcannon with Explosives AND Luck in the Chamber. The ... what was it? Heaven and Hell Pilgrim? With Auto Fire and Stability - I had decent rolls!) - and as far as PvP is concerned it seemed a bit more reasonable. As so to think of ordinary shooters that had only ... 10 weapons total ... for instance. The "Bling Bling" fatigue I guess comes from the emotional awareness of the fact that everything that comes out of there is basically ... at some point worthless. The "end-game loop" basically looks so: You get loot, you disassemble it, you go to Banshee, ... and then what? So, when you disassemble stuff you get 'parts' - and you give them to banshee who for ... 25 or so gives you an engram. That engram contains a weapon and mods. So aside of the mods you then just disassemble the weapon - until you have no parts left. The only thing that comes out at the bottom are mods. If you have all your gear modded however, that return then only amounts to "mod kits". So, out of three blue mods make one purple one, disassemble it for a mod kit. For 2 mod kids you can then buy mods from Banshee.

Is it about that though? Isn't it about playing with Friends? PvP? PvE?

But there I also noted another thing. When making in-game achievements purchasable for money, you either 'steal' valuable gaming experiences from those who are willing to play, or game quality for those who arent. Experiences, Quality, ... what? It can be argued that ... Destiny and other games like it are for Narcissists. Ugh. Err ... m. Yea. Its weird.


From the perspective as someone who enjoys it as a "Social Space Gameplay Hub", emotes are Fun. Being cool is equal to others being cool; Urh, like ... its a silly thing, but ... once upon a time there were Mr. T Grenades in World of Warcraft. When thrown, players hit by them would get a Mohawk Nightelf Head. There is a bit of privilege to it, a.k.a. "having them" - which is different to Character Customization; But ... maybe more important. The thing is that there is social space; Where people meet and do stuff together. So I met this dude during some quest and we ended up doing more and more stuff together, hanging out eventually ... a.k.a. Chatting. Perhaps a Blizzard employee to keep/get me invested?
Maybe not. Whatever. Gimmicks and Gadgets as part of the Sandbox is the issue. Stuff to do is stuff to do. Chatting is Chatting. Interactions, or communication, in a Game environment 'includes' in game activities. So - it all started with the teabag. We might say. Teabagging is a PvP habit whereby one who just killed an oponent would walk up to its corpse (after one dies the camera in some games is focussed on the own corpse until respawn) and push the crouch button repeatedly; Which basically is 'taunting' the waiting player by showing him his inability to do anything about it (/the desecration of his corpse). So, communication. On an abstract plane. Sign language. Teabag means as much as "Haaa haa!". This eventually became a part of social interactions between friends. When in a raid for instance and some player falls down a hole the player needs to wait for respawn, or in some cases for another player to revive him. And so teabagging the corpse sometimes is standard issue - not as an insult but joking between friends. We can further enjoy emotes because they tell something about us. They allow ourselves to express ourselves further beyond just appearances. And what may be seen as narcissism at first is a social space in the end.


But seriously, how important is this?




Judas was it I guess, lets just say, was "triggered" as oil got wasted to 'annoint' Jesus. It could have been sold while Jesus sortof indulged in what may be reviewed as 'decadent behaviour'. That may have led to Judas thinking of Jesus as a Fraud and thus betraying him. So, Jesus proclaiming that one of them would betray him didn't 'shock' Judas all that much - it maybe even just furthered his dissent.

I don't know ... we don't know how that exactly unfolded - in regards to the others; But ... its kindof there in the story that the Apostles were left more and more confused. This certainly resonates with the issues of relevance. So - the Messiah had been there before them, but then he sortof left without changing anything. Change were in this sense so for instance the humanitarian work to do something against poverty for instance. I can imagine Judas as someone who's been pretty much on board with the whole shit. Banking up cash to make something happening that is good for the people - being pretty much fuelled by a pretty spartanic attitude.

So its basically 'taking it easy' vs being serious about it. So, no matter how steep the mountain - always moving on and laying the groundwork for tackling greater challenges.
I can see why this would look good - but, if God would tell me that its not going to work ... hmm. I mean, its ... unclear. You may wonder: Isn't it Gods job to make it work? But could we then not go and say: Why is there any work to begin with? ? So is it about the difficulty Level God sets up for us; Then we're worried about 'easy mode' being like stepping on the poor; But hard-mode doesn't really change it, only changing the time-frame. So - there is disarray.


Is it resolved? Well - I ... was however rambling on Videogames and that seems to be where this would be going for now.

What I was referring to by the headline 'Mjolyr' was a feeling ... of anger ... sortof. Something unsettling, deep inside, reflecting on something internal, something I couldn't quite put a finger on; That I just felt this ... inner desire ... about, to smash it to bits. And the idea is a bit that this 'thing' to be smitten represents Video Games or gaming.

Is gaming good? Well, 'can' it be good? Whatever. That is one thing. I would go and defend gaming; But by doing so this weird "anonymous evil" got to spread in my heart. I think that is due to what I 'influence' or affected by doing so. If me supporting gaming equals me supporting the games industry as it is ... I have to retract my statements.


If money determines now 'how' games are being made, what their content is about; The whole thing is going to fall as it corrupts the very heart of art and creativity. Is this related?

Making money over life quality?

Another related thing ...


Oooh, what a clusterfuck.

So, the come right to the point with that. No, Chris Ray Gun is not an imbacile. Well - this whole shitshow comes down to one point. The issue of violence and Chris shrugs it off, basically glancing over that point, by saying 'stupid stuff' like that there will always be violence. The problem with that issue there is that it is an issue that weighs more or goes deeper than ... the concerns of Chris. Chris is here making a video against Feminism with a position as established in a variety of ways already. And then sure he also gets to the point: What you wanna do about it? Is this a silencing of women? Well - kindof.

But not! This is the thing: He shows their video - and comments on it. So, if he talks shit I will realize that. And this point of concern is certainly not lost on any of us. In a debate of ideology, the whole 'what you want' vs 'what you want is trash', that has basically no value. It is a thing that is bad - or good - depending on who is in power. So here we have that patriarchy that we keep hearing about; Maybe. Those in power will be in charge of solving our problems, or, determining what a problem is and what isn't.

The struggle of ideologies now has to basically come to a conclusion, whereby a winner is being victorious and then put in charge over what is being done. If they think that domestic violence against women is good, then well, what you gonna do about it?

If we could settle on the score that emancipation 'has' been achieved and let women so do what they want to do - well, aren't we there yet? What problems? Ahh - problem #1: People that yet remain assholes! As ... apartheid had been around in the US for still some time after the Afro American had been freed from Slavery. And it were privileged white men that fought for that, by the way.
"We don't do it for the thanks, but you're welcome!" I can imagine someone saying.
Yet some dude is still standing in his kellar whipping himself shouting "Sorry I'm white, Sorry I'm male".

And that is where domestic violence comes in. 'Assholes'. What we can do about it isn't even a matter of ideology; Except for the issue that a dominant ideology provides a platform for talking of those/such issues more effectively. If you however build this platform around censorship ... hmm - ... .
I mean - its ... project it into the future. What is being 'built' today will be 'solid' in the future. At least - by principle of Form. So, if we today invest ressources into an infrastructure of censorship and control; We might risk not being flexible enough in the future to get rid of it.
That is why it is a Freedom of Speech issue!


And this ... ugh, - ... well. Its perhaps the same issue as with the intrisic Weapons perks of Destiny 2. I ... am not fully on board with the cynicism against it; But that may be because I don't really think like a Troll. I can however fully get on board with the part ... where, I for myself am concerned of it being a rather flimsy thing. I can feel the trouble oozing in. I mean - its pretty "standard" in the end. If we want something like web ID transparency, which I want myself, we have to make sure that we tackle it correctly. Why we know that caution is advised? Well - it 'should' be. The point is that if we know something about anything we might want to do, we should not "safely disregard" that knowledge! Imagine what if the inventors of Space Travel "safely disregarded" the existence of radiation? Well - they would save a lot of money! Possibly! Maybe. How much is a human life?

How do we know about the dangers of radiation in space flight? Well - perhaps from assuming that radiation might be out there and then trying to figure out just how much before sending someone out there. Sure, if we don't know about something ... well ... thats part of the risk. So we might want to really think this through ... where, another side of it is genious and design.

Genious?

So to me the term 'genious' also is less of a thing that someone 'is' - and more of a thing someone 'has'. So - anyone in history ever whom we might want to consider a genious has been genious on a certain field. In regards to a certain thing. So, Newton or Einstein - most prominently - in the fields of Astrophysics. Here the 'being' a genious idea could be portrayed when thinking of Astrophysics as of 'everything', and their genious therein basically as a medium to its truth. The idea being: Take 'a genious' and 'immerse him into a reality' and he/she/it will 'inherantly' draw conclusions of progress. The difference to recognizing 'the genious' as something one 'has' is drawn as to recognize 'a genious' as only profficient within certain environments. Thereby the individual mindset of the person who is considered to be genious is 'responsible' for which fields the individual is a genious in.

Having a genious would certainly help a person to be more generally above average. That were as to the nature of "the advancing of things" that is "inherantly a trait of geniousity". That the simple principles within the complex can be applied on different things in totally different fields. I would though argue that the more unorthodox appearances of an Albert Einstein compared to an Isaac Newton compare to the nature of their findings. Newtonian Physics is practical to the 'objectively experienced reality' - its, normal, its what we'd expect. Its ... 'logical'. Gravity as the attraction between two bodies, mathematical 'constants' describing the reliable nature of our reality, ... thats all sane. However then describing some weird space-time wherein space is bent rather than there being a force of attraction, destorted in space and time, whereby what we see has to be taken as never entirely true to what there actually is, ... that is a little bit ... "off center". Kindof. Once it sinks in and becomes the new norm - OK - sure! But then we also get to fundamentally realize that our reality must be seen as compounds of reference rather than a euclidic plane. Saying some bit more about individuality.


So - on a sidenote: Its ironic how Einsteins theory takes physics, a.k.a. the "I only believe what I can see" type of attitude in response to theology, back into the invisible! ^^


Certainly is my idea of the Genious also a bit more Mythical than being just a linguistic phenomenon. The genious thereby there exists as something more like a compass given by the divine. This compass then guides the individual to their accomplishments.

Its all however less "magical" than it might seem. In terms of our hypothetical genious here who knows how to develop an AI, the thing that makes him stand above others can be explained as follows: The Level of Insight that he has in constructing an AI comes along with an internal understanding of its driving processes. Thus the margin of error is held within an inherantly functional system which furthermore enhances his understanding for the factual flaws of the system.


This I mostly relate to in regards to my artistic past. The difference between having an artistic vision and not having one, is most comprehensive to me when I compare myself during class to my classmates. Or - looking at the contents of my (paper) "block". I think we can also compare it to Starcraft. So, how do you start in the game? You send your workers to mine, ... and 'of course' you first of all build more workers so you have a higher income; Instead of waiting until you can effort anything else. But the game doesn't tell you to do it. Anywhere. So - it really is something one has to figure out. And you don't 'have' to either. There are strategies that involve not doing that. So the 6-pool. The 6 is for the amount of workers and pool refers to the building to build zerglings. With a 6-pool you have zerglings faster than with a 12-pool, but with a 12-pool you can get a whole lot more of them! (more resources faster) The thing with the 6-pool is that there is a small window of success - and properly utilizing it involves knowledge about 'that', which again involves knowledge of 'first' building workers. Protoss and Terran for instance do have enough time - generally - to block off their ramp before the 6-pool zerglings would arrive. Anyhow. Herein the genious is ... basically less spectacular. Its routine; Or common sense.



[from, some days ago]


Saying - I mean, part of this is fate. Well, of course. So lets just say that it is talent; And talented people make it far - or further than normals - or whatever. And they need the insight or foresight to consider things. So from my end, one suggested feature were purpose. Asking for what we are trying to achieve, or how it is to factor in. We can there think of the Star Trek Computer and how each user is identified. Well of course, "thats just like a Computer system" - which the internet is as well. So we are today practicing some form of online activity where 1 side is the machines processing and the other side are services we access through profiles. So, google provides one, yahoo provides one, blizzard, valve, sony, microsoft, ... - they are all individual providers of services that are hooked to the internet. With Google owning YouTube, of course the two identities could or would melt. Basic online anonymity is already gone via the machine or the corresponding connection itself. These services are knowing you while within their services you appear by your profile. Well, fancy terms. There is a high end interpretation of this that would work in a movie and is quite accurate, where on the cruder side of things the general key to ones profile were an id plus password. So, that is how those services know you. But still the machine you are using is also known to the service. I mean. How sure is this? The service knows some way of sending its packages your way, lets put it that way. So, what it knows you by could already be just a "phantom" - that is how TOR works - but you still have a standing connection to something that knows your machine.

TOR is a service to obscure that ID, so, instead of you getting a service profile you get a phantom ID to access a service profile.

But ... whats the point? How do we stop people from bullying? Or protect people against harassment? What gets me stressed about it tho is, well ... this ... flashwave of insanity. The Anti-SJW position is or feels a bit like standing at a beach and you see a huuuge fucking tsunami rolling your way and the only thing you can do is stand there and laugh about it. And is it bad? Is something fake?

Well - the Anti-SJW thing ... well, yea, the term 'the Skeptical Community' is a thing. It already is a thing, but for my purposes it is a differnt thing. There is the insanity in the internet that spawned a community of "Antagonists" that oppose these ideas with reason. They basically make up shop and look through the web and shout out everything they can find that contains bullshit. So the product is 'reason' or 'rationality' in regards to whatever arbitrary or random context. Here, talking about Online Harassment - it may seem that we're loosing ... a proper sense of contexts.

The "pro censorship" flagship is a strong appeal to the sensitivity of people that can relate to the harms of 'Online Harassment'. Which is harassment as bad as it is, yet just extended into the internet. But what are we talking about? Harassment from a person within the victims actual life, ... err? I mean ... or Harassment from anonymous people on the web virtually attacking or harassing public figures? Same thing? Well ... nope! Your daughter "Julie" is more likely to be harassed from people she goes to school with than from some internet Troll that shitposts on the Blizzard Forums.

If she were harassed by being on such Forum, well - is that still this Harassful? Its an Online ID, with Avatar and full Jabang, so - you can be whatever you want to be, even a confederate flag, ... and you use that ID 'actively' to interact with anything associated to it. The way how facebook stands out is in that it is more closely connected to our everyday lives.

So - what is Online Harassment? ... Hmm ... any point?


The point I was trying to make is that eventually betterment is something that comes by chance. Its like going for Critical Damage (so, frequent hits with Bonus damage rather than consistent damage without bonus) in an RPG. An RPG would however simulate that using some Random Number Generator. In reality ... the thing is more intrinsically bound into the foundations of the universe and stuff.

So. ...







Living from Shit being posted in the Internet. Hmm ... what a job description.
Or documenting the shitflow ...

Watchdogs. Or ... well, what does it take to get someone to doing those videos? Those that do their work well - err, have success - have something to tell. It are people that at some point ... well ... "got triggered" ... being something as a response to the critical mass of BS on the internet.
Not?



Are the baddies concerned that Sex in Videogames drags too much attention away from their own "Sex Dolls" - like, are 'real women' afraid that they are loosing Value due to folks being able to get their "fake fixes" also from those games?



Or am I too guilty of taking sexualized Characters in Video Games too normally? Oh dear. OK, lets get to this - ... again: Tropes vs. Women in Videogames.

The main message here is that Sexualized Characters are being created for the Straight Male. The counterstance is that this is a misrepresenting statement. Pointing out how men are also sexualized in Games amongst other things; Or how else these accusations are misrepresentations lacking proper context.
The issue now, aside of that, is now that there are women that feel offended by how certain females in media are being presented.

But - ... ahwr.


There are things we take for granted. Then we may come to doubt that. Once we realize that this doubt was unwarranted - we may come to an agonizing experience; Which is further dragged into the negative through our fear of being/getting fooled. I mean ... uhwrg, the pain.

Art! Artwork that sells is Artwork that connects. An intimate piece of art has the power of creating intimate connections. By intimate ... one of the best examples might be Final Fantasy VII wherein one of its creators shares his experiences of loosing a beloved Family Member. He there created a touching story that connected with many people around the world!

That is different to some blunt Action shtick that is carried by explosions and one-liners. A bit. Maybe not. Well - the art ... of connection - eh?

"Creators Fault". Well, what does the Creator do? He has a blank sheet of paper and now what? The one person invented Dragonball, someone else invented Gundams, ... so, ... and whether now someone comes up with a story from within or from things he knows sell - just a minor technical detail?
So here comes what seems elusive, yet people have to frequently say it: Heart or Soul - if something lacks that - ... hmm, someone got thinking, and tried to create it artificially and eventually succeeded in it. Is anything special?
Whats?
What people want manifests in mass media. Doesn't it? Sexualized Females get created by possibly straight males and get sold to possibly straight males. Is it good or bad? Well - nobody could have anticipated that Street Fighter 2 would become the success it got. So - thinking about Chun-Li as one of the first "sexualized Heroines" - should they have been more decent?

I once thought so. I now refer to that as having been Mormonized. I don't think the attitude is bad; But I don't think it should have influence on art design. Well, OK, instead of Chun-Li, lets look at Duke Nukem. "Shocker": Sex Sells. OK, does that say that Duke Nukem 3D shouldn't have existed? But is the huge success of Duke Nukem 3D just due to its sexual content? What if 3D Realms had used the engine for something else? Well, we wouldn't have DN3D - but, a more politically correct "just as good" game?

Something that kept Duke Nukem 3D pretty popular was its modifiability. And sure, the Sexual Assets were one of the main things that got me invested into it. So, a bit of 'guilty pleasure'. I had previously used Level Editors for Wolfenstein, later also creating Half Life and Unreal Tournament/Deus Ex maps. Well, "Digital Lego" - basically. That had nothing to do with Sex - except in Duke 3D and Deus Ex some ... well. Those Games have a more 'domestic' palette. So, its a bit like the Sims in that its easier to build a cozy house in Duke Nukem than it is in Doom. Because of the Graphics.
So of course eventually I would put some strippers into my house - but what is now the problem?

How old was I? What was my social situation? What was my general emotional balance? Was I getting socially awkard because I satisfied my sexuality through media; Or was I socially awkward for other reasons and found refuge in media?

Or put it another way: What does the player get from a Sexualized male or female in a movie, book or game? "I hate to bring it to you", but sexual satisfaction is part of a desirable relationship. Isn't it? So, dreams. And eventually someone will find his own Lara Croft or Cortana or whatever Waifu ... maybe. [Shiit. Do you really want to compare the original Ghostbusters to the reboot?]
The Original Ghostbusters then has this neat story between the Rick Moranis Character and the Secretary; And I don't know what I have to think about the Chris Hemsworth Character, but ... Rick Moranis isn't a flattering depiction of men either. And he's the fucking "Keymaster". It may be just co-incidence that the Original movie is this good, but for being that good it also has a pretty good reputation. Ironically.
Before the Internet even existed, many people individually agreed all around the planet that this was a good movie!
Is that important? Well, it makes it safer to say I guess.

"This needs to stop" - one dude on the Internet regarding that Ghostbusters film and goes on "This is Cancer!". Is that fair?
It sure needs to stop! Somethings terribly wrong there.

The thing is that I believe we all have different dreams. And someone who isn't turned on by Cammy is looking for something or someone else. Or ... is there such a thing? What this note is to end on is that maybe the presence of oversexualized Characters in Video Games mirrors an unsatisfied need within the masses.


So - a crowd of straing males made Duke 3D the success that it is; Probably - I would guess. I would also guess that the most people that made maps for Unreal Tournament were straight males. What I mean is that someone who's spending a lot of time on the computer for entirely non-sexual purposes is also going to get socially awkward ... maybe. Ish. And so virtual sex is also closer than real one; And depending on so and so he would try to look for joy elsehwere. Progress is Offensive!



//2017.10.27|01:33!08:46//



Am I now just pretending like ... this is a generally good direction? Am I missing something?

This whole SJW bullshit isn't over? Hmm - where were we? Judas!


Well, I want to not miss out - at any rate - getting clear of some Misconception about gaming that has been bugging me. Games 'are not' Fun! Well, the idea that a Video Game is this thing, a Disc maybe, you put into a console or PC and peoples faces turn into smiley faces as they mindlessly dabble around on them controllers - thats not pretty accurete! It happens, sure, within social settings where some game can be fun for a couple of hours; But in broad and wide - that isn't what gaming is like or about.

In essence - to comprehend gaming in these terms you have to start with a picture of boredom. Of perfect utterly boring boredom. And gaming here is "maybe" the sunrise after the night - in some comedic way - but in this image compares better to a cockroach that crawls along the scene and happens to be something interesting enough to break the boring for some time.

Well, as 'exciting' as chess! Or pool!


Dark Souls - I'm sure there is something bad to be said about this gome; Something I 'have to' mention as otherwise I'm "exposed" for the 'biased fanboy' I am. "Dark Souls isn't hard" - eventually one has died often enough to either call it a day or beat that fucking boss. But skill?
Oh God!
This is basically the point where, if this were a video, I would start hurting myself.

Not because of me thinking that your stupidity is painful - not like you, if you believed it, were the problem. But because thinking about it hurts me, the mere presence of this issue is retarded, ... uh, but it goes deeper. Something about "last resorts". And whats even worse is that statement is taken as me giving up. OK fine! I give up! Now go away!

OK, I'm still here, you're still here - so I guess it doesn't mean anything!

"You" (sorry, dear reader - ...) want to tell me now that the only redeeming grace about Dark Souls is that it is a "Skill Game"? Not? Well, it are these kind of ... "pretentious asumptions" that are currently breaking the world apart! Oh, its breaking the 'world', so shouldn't I be welcoming it?

So, because of some convoluted argumentation we have to go out on a cruisade to forcefully redeem this planet from gaming? ... ???
What?



This 'demand for conclusions' has been one of the first topics I cared about on this site. But that is the very problem. SJWs holding on to their agenda - like thats the only way the good things they want are going to come about. Like Judas holding on to his social justice like there is no other way good things, or better things, could come about.
Everyone pulling its own string, never wanting to let go because ..., but nobody taking care of all the ropes being actually aligned properly to not cause a huge gigantic chaos. How could we? One ... or all ... would have to let go for a while!

I don't know how often I felt as though someone else out there got ecstatic over "having me" ... you know, trapped or something. So you "got something" in your net there - some ... 'evil' ... or is it? What is it that you 'got'?

What you 'got' ... if I may continue this semi-random uncontextual babbling ... are cases that emerge as negatives within this society that currently renders the outlines and margins of our existence.



Something else thats genuinely wrong about gaming is that it has become an industry that is way too large! Think about it: "Back in the days" - when you had just a Game Boy - what did you play? Uh, sorry. What did 'we' play? Tetris? Aaand? I mean - what I'm getting at is that we were used to ... a few basic games to beat down time, when it gets to casual stuff. Tetris, Snake, Columns ... well, Candy Crush stuff. The problem however is that if we have one Tetris, we don't need yet another one where the blocks are just colored slightly different. That is one side. On the other we never had any evolution of gaming if we just said: "Stop right there!". Where does this take us? Right back into todays industry?
Its not hard to see that the grabbing for cash dominates the industry. Everyone is realizing that this isn't sustainable as each is everyone elses concurrence; And everyone wants to do well for themselves - so ... this scene in 'Iron Sky' where "they" discover the Helium 3 tanks comes to mind. Each pulling their own rope ... never willing or able to let go.

Imagine if in Chess you could buy your pawns in using real money. "Wouldn't that be awesome!?".

Is that now a problem of Chess? Should we ban boardgames while we're at it? "Competition is Toxic!". (Street Fighter perpetuates violence against Hardware [you know, aggressively throwing the controller into a corner ... that stuff]).


A note on slavery: Sometimes our worse enemy is ourself. Sometimes we need a kick up our butt to get moving. But are we 'always' capable of more? What if 'exceptional stress' became norm? Wouldn't we loose perspective for what 'actually' 'is' normal?


Similar thing to 'Copyright issues' on YouTube. What is "Fair Use" nowadays? I would want a world where people could actually be held accountable for their Bullshit. Thinking about the YouTube Adpocalypse; Who is to be blamed? The Algorithm? "What, your entirely non-controversial YouTube channel got entirely demonetized and you get into financial problems because of that? Sorry!".
Similar?
What is similar about it?


Perhaps the utter absence of anything even just remotely resembling even the tiniest sparks of reason!


I can go on and be really paranoid about everyone whom I even just remotely agree with because "reasons" - and that 'because' of being actually quite rational. It should be considered because it might be true and otherwise I'd be terribly irresponsible. But same as with Horoscopes we eventually get too busy being bothered than being actually busy in a reasonable way.



Whats wrong is this world - but the things we do in it ... ?



What I'm trying to say here is that if we're too fixated on something we eventually loose sight for other things. If we think of the now and then as a fight where we have to really pull ourselves up by our bootstraps to make something happening - what could we accomplish? If we save all the starving people and destroyed our own culture doing so, what would we have to offer them?

To find the wrongs we got to do right and see what opposes us!





Thats how the whole SJW thing stood for me. From all the "sides" that there are, Anti-SJWs had the most to say that I wanted to say myself. And what pushback came? Feminists? Well, not really! YouTube! The Wallstreet Journal. Kindof odd! You know ... "Online Harassment" or whatever.

So, because your "Daughter Julie" is an asshole on the Internet and gets trolled for it, people that I think are doing a great service to us all are being bereft of their ability to do so. Ish. Were it not for the fact that people believe in what they do and supported them via Patreon.

Here people pay for Content they 'know' exists. Giving Money to ... I don't know ... TJ Kirk for instance (I don't support anyone financially; And my first couple of bucks would probably go to China Uncensored) is a transparent deal. All I can expect to get in return is yet another shitty TJ Kirk video. I'm not paying for anything more than his freedom. Or so the existence of his BS. Sorry, "BS". And BS. Thats different to what SJWs do. People think they pay for gender equality, rights of women, etc. - but they actually just pay people that ask for money 'for' those things where whatever those people do is already the 'it' that practically is to equal gender equality. "Support female con-artists too because gender equality!".

Maybe its the same thing. Maybe its just about Videos and individuals freedom to produce them. But it seems like an aweful lot of that money ... also factors into leverage against Anti-SJWs.

Anita Sarkeesian is on the YouTube censorship committee or what is it?

How does this happen?

Why do you not care?



Uh, pardon me! Is this rope pulling? Uh - I was trying to make a point. And the point in my oppinion is a good one! Its a "Hey, get off my Lawn!" type of thing. And that isn't just 'rhetorically' my lawn like setting up shop in a public park, despite someone out there possibly taking it that way because he thinks he has the power to be like that type of person; Adpocalypse 3.0 then; Its 'my' lawn as in: "What the fuck you doing out there shitting all over my front yard?". Well, that lawn were as little mine as a real garden I owned; I guess - since ownership really seems to be trending towards devaluation - ... except you're rich ... filthy rich ... - "the audacity"!

Am I doing things 'right' here?



It seems like I'm onto something. So, rope pulling is bad? Well, this is just self-defense! And not rhetorical self-defense like "I killed him because he trolled me on the Internet". Real self-defense like "I shot him because he invaded my property!".

Or does it all belong to Google? The thing is that they bought YouTube, so technically they're just on lease too. They at least didn't build it, so ... we could argue that maybe there in deed 'are' folks that'd be better at managing it. And here's the obvious issue: Money vs real interest!



And so we're still at the core of the issue. "Insanity!"





However. To add a smooth round-up to that: What I'm really going to say here is that you should 'pay' 'attention' - and nothing more. I mean, you should pay for your food and whatever the hell you need or want; Obviously; But don't think like "this or that now urgently needs your financial support". Nope!

If you are invested - thats different. Do your thing. Support Common Wealth if you really have too much money and don't know where to put it. The more transparently Common Wealth it is the better.


And don't look for Saints! So, while we're at it. Anyone you think is a saint is possibly a crook! Or still not quite that perfect!
"Look for the Saint in yourself!" (Yaaay!) - ... ^^ ... - yea, but really!





Hulk Smash

Rolling d20 (digital one). What? For 9?



CNS.2017.10.27|12:08