... "Everything!" ...

So, I was about to write something after being triggered by something stupid I read on the Internet. Or so I thought. Then I came home and didn't know what I wanted to write about anymore; And so ... naturally ... I didn't.
But eventually it returned to me - and while showering I realized that ... it's actually such a widely thrown about comment/idea, usually in close proximity to other stuff that rather obviously only exists to "trigger the Libs", I didn't feel like it anymore. So I would think that I don't know what to expect from lecturing folks who apparently aren't capable of independent thought - and realized that actually, also, banking on independent thought is kinda my brand. Although it might seem like a bad idea. And so ... I figure ... under the line ... I want to pin that onto the "curious, but whatever" board. A.k.a. the forget and discard if only I could pile.

Then, while taking the same shower - I remembered some other thing I wanted to write about. And it may just be what had me turn on my Computer in the first place - as ... I knew I had SOMETHING to write about. And I noticed ... that ... this topic may actually play favorably into what I wanted to write "about" going into the showever.

What it means to Love God with all your Heart and all your Soul

So, "back in the day" - or so: at multiple occasions - I figured that I probably should write about this. But as an opportunity never presented itself, I settled with leaving it up to independent thought. At the time I was primarily concerned of - at least within my mindset - catering to atheists. So, the least likely group to "figure this one out" - and so I also wouldn't really stress it. I suppose ... there wasn't really an angle to doing that either ... and platitudes ... aren't a thing you'd need me for.

And yea, I was actually somewhat optimistic. What I got on the matter now ... does however go a bit beyond being "just a take" on the matter. I might be something like ... the actual core reality/truth behind the statement.

And so I would have started by stating, that "one thing that the Bible leaves out about that" - is that God can be many things. But maybe that's a bit too provocative - where, I think it's time I also cater some more to the Christians and other Believers. But it is certainly true.
It may sound like I'm saying that the Bible tries to obscure something - and I, quite frankly, am sure that it does in deed obscure the one or the other thing, but this one is more a fault of lacking. A lack that can be credited to the very brief time that the scripture had to develop any kind of meaningful theology. Especially given that the Gnostic component has ... I'd say: effectively been torn away from what it could have been.

But to those that come from a Believer's background ... I'm sure this will be/is a treat. I mean, I get it. Harsh world, dark colors everywhere ... though yea, something something victims and abusers - but ... I get it. The Bible (or corresponding counterpart) is barely at the core of the believers appreciation for God. As such it is far more pleasant to heed the spoken word - than it is to sift through ancient text. Given a few exceptions.
And so are the scriptures often somewhat harsh. Therefre it is quite popular, I reckon, to cheer on people who manage to talk of the loving God that people believe in. To take a Character as apparently mean as the God of the Old Testament; And shine a light on the loving aspects thereof. Atheists might be totally out of the loop concerning this one - even the formerly Christian ones if their Christian background is yucky enough.

But so - what does it mean to Love God ... so fully and so entirely ... as the Bible seems to require?

I wouldn't be surprised if the one or the other preacher/pastor/whatever stumbled accorss the answer - and if atheists wouldn't right away resonate with that rhetoric. That because on the surface, it speaks of sacrifice. Of letting go. Of giving up. Of waiving. As ... to commit your heart fully to God implies ... there isn't a lot left for other things. And what I wrote previously ... is a really good context to get a little bit beyond the platitudes of it.

So I said, that God can be many things. By that I don't mean to say that one can make anything their God - but that God can "shine His light" through a great many of things. What one is to understand is - as I've tried to point out here and there - that God has chosen His very own transcendental nature as the one to approach us from. As such He doesn't ultimately present Himself through a figure - as Jesus so spent a great deal of his pointing things out to be pointing towards the Father. As that, God is immaterial to us. Inevitably and intrinsically a part of us. And in that sense, for us to become Christ-like implies as much as becoming beacons of the divine Light towards each other. But not so in the dull way where we're perplexed by some lightshow - as 'the Divine Light' is a far more magnificent thing.
One might vibe with the take, that Loving God implies Love for the things He's given us. But what I think needs to be watched thereby, is what we recognize as something 'given by God'. Thus I don't mean to speak of worldly things. For, while the one was born rich, the other was born with a serious physical condition. So, it doesn't really ... work out in the macro to take things that way. Like sure. While some might win in a lottery, others get run over by cars.
And so - on that note - these things that we might think are 'given' to us - they are also things that inspire us to become really vile. Or be it something that "is given" to someone else, while you think you deserved it more - or such.

So, I watched Titans the other evening. That DC show on Netflix. Which I find hillarious ... because ... in a lot of ways it reminds me what we nowadays might regard "bad shows from the 80s and 90s". But it wasn't unpleasant to watch. And so there was that one Episode in which Nightwing got thrown into the Lazarus Pit - and had a bit of an emotional episode watching it. And yea, what ... TV shows or movies generally tend to do a really miserable job at, is to communicate different Levels of emotion. I mean, there are these really abstract fever dream like conditions in which some inner turmoil gnaws at one's psyche and it becomes a real struggle to come out the other end - but on the screen it's difficult to not present it in a way that appears to be as lucid of a situation as sober reality.
And that segment of the show I'd say deals a lot with identity or fake identity. Masks. The idea of or behind a costume and the association its wearer has with it. And so is the whole Batman and Robin and Nightwing narrative one around fear - using fear as a weapon - which for Nightwing clearly meant to inhabit an appearance that commands respect by fear; That coupled with an anger-fueled sense of righteousness that probably comes with hish line of work - being by all accounts a normal human being trying to play in the league of superheroes. And so he has anger issues. And that's what his episode in the Lazarus Pit meant to highlight - I'd argue. So, his visions of scarecrow giving a voice to his dark side, "being" himself (as) the Joker ... with a crowbar in his hands beating down on Red Hood - that is the anger driven personification of Nightwing. And is probably similar to what motivated Red Hood. And while it might not translate well into the context of the show - as there isn't really a divine angle offered to those things - these 'bad' fragments of what we fill our lives with can so become "fake identites" - a.k.a. things we love, cherish, put our hearts into ... and subsequently strive for - and the more we do collectively serve them, the more we're prone to making this world a living hell for one another. That because these things are selfish.

So, that is the context that ... we might say ... helped birth this realization in me. And that right into my ... well ... I wouldn't really call it an identity crisis. I don't have an identity crisis - just ... comprehension issues and ... the only thing I know is to be confident about it. So-to-speak.
So - internally I'm already celebrating myself to be THE Queen; Because in all fairness ... that's what I am. Or am I? Well - the problem comes with the kind of authority that people might require for such a thing to be established. And as the tropes have it - wanting to be something you're not; Or so, someone with fame and power and influence and all that - is a bad thing. Being His Queen however ... I'm in this situation where when I heed the logic of humble; I'm moving away from what I truly am. And if He would let me - I'd eventually start wanting to deny it - to then live as though I weren't. In as far as He however makes me understand that I'm His Queen ... my ... relationship to life develops in such a way ... that I would then live in denial of a part of me that wisdom would require me to own.

So yea. Previously the point of contention was my Clarity. The same kind of struggle - but - I guess on the opposite end of the "status quo" spectrum. And I touched upon it briefly - concerning "the Spine" - that it resembles some kind of counter-balance. And balance is basically the important word here ... . So, being myself submissive and devote - the danger is in not realizing when the accommodating reality were to grow toxic.
Theory aside - being Queen is certainly a more palettable example for what God's love does deliver to me. Maybe it's not less controversial - but that's just how it is.

To not get hung up on terms and their implications though, the thing - in simple terms - is about Loving God by the things He gives us - and is alive through and within - as we receive them directly from Him. Which, naturally, are at first - or ultimately - intangible things. So is there not a crown or a scepter I could hold on to, to tell myself that I'm Queen. I just notice that I start loosing myself when I fail to ... 'live up to it' ... I guess.
I mean, I try not to "doub it with untempered mortar" - as it were. To say ... I can be sloppy and put it as what is implied; But the actual truth right now is still a bit more nuanced.

Now, to say that I Love God by what He has given to me ... is a little bit wrong. Deflectively. But what one is to consider is, that God isn't a thing that can be easily Loved. As Love tries to fathom - it gets clear that by Loving God one tries to fathom the unfathomable. So we can substitute God with Jesus, the Holy Scripture, Doctrime, Pleasantries ... but those then are substitutes. Some of them may be introduced to us via this Love. And my work is an expression thereof. And so, yet and still, God maintains Himself as transcendental. Intangible. Unfathomable. And this is also how we can exist in the Mangle - or so: As the imperfect beings we are - limited; Or more to the point: As social beings. In this day and age it might be more abstract to argue for seeing God in the other - so lets for now just stick to: "Life begets meaning by Living".

In brief:

God can be many things - as He is within and through the Son and the Holy Spirit; As He was through a burning bush or a Light piercing the skies. As we thirst for meaning and guidance; We seek truth that delivers us unto life. And in the truth that reconciles us with the divine - we may individually find God ... and love Him by virtue of the life given to us.

And unto the evening followed Night

Now, what I wanted out of writing ... "today" ... was to trigger 'the Conservatives' (for a change) ... "so f***in hard" - "it'd make their heads explode". But more. A lot of things. Spiced up with a little bit of my ego. Or a lot. Whatever.

Generally I think I'm on a good course towards that. What I want is to trigger them so hard - that everyone who has a stake in their f***in nonsense is going to get a proverbial aneurysm trying to defend their position; And so everyone brainwashed to follow them - with the rest being happy that they're not a part of that.

I'm not sure if I can qualify that ask in terms of how reasonable it is - but it does feel like something I need. And so I figure ... throwing them some "Oh, look at how demonic I am" type of bait ... might help a bit towards that. At the end of the day it's however mostly about what 'you' are doing ... and being awesome certainly helps. So, it's a lot that I ask ... maybe ... but as we just learned: It is bad to get hung up on the wrong things. Even if they're right - or at least a part of that - it's ever so often also a matter of the 'how'. Sure is there so what "I want", what "I (think I) need" - and that may very well be good and fine and awesome ... and all ... but sometimes things take time - as I'd argue: Especially when they are to come in unexpected ways. So, whatever it is that I want ... or need ... right now ... I have this idea or insight ... philosophy ... that ocurred to me once which I think to share here.

And in essence the story goes ... that it has been morning ... it has been day ... during which, let's put it that way - it's probably cool and epic and all that, we had an eclipse; And then came upon us the evening. What must logically follow ... is the night. It might sound scary - but what a lot of people might know is, that the night ... doesn't have to be scary. It can be quite pleasant. Sure ... a bonfire ... some music ... but in the grand scheme of things ... that's somewhat limited. Nowadays we however also have elictricity and other boons that would have been miracolous even just 200 years ago.

So, what the night brings ... isn't entirely beyond our control. Like so could we start to panic, lay everything to waste and be ... exposed and naked when it falls upon us. Or ... we can ... as the Bible advises us ... try to be prepared. That sure is one angle.

The other angle ... well ... . I had to think - about the legalization of Cannabis. In the context of german/european politics. Maintaining its illegality, to me, is as a symbol for the reign of the day. It is the reign ... well ... I guess: Of capitalism, but ... I don't mean to take it there. It is also, but not really the point either, the reign of conservatism. The working class. The maintenance of law and order for the sake of productivity. But as evening comes ... one shouldn't maintain the whip to brute force all of mankind but an elite through a night shift ... as it were. And ... in however many ways ... people may find truth to this allegory. With plenty of warnings - no need to hear it from me. My point would anyway be borderline supersitious - as I might be speaking of we might get good or bad weather during the night ... depending on how favorable "the fates" are upon us.

And sure - as ... a divine entity ... I suppose I've got some PTSD that informs me that I'll probably be blamed somehow for whatever it is that'll come - but from a position of optimism I would hope that we could have a thanksgiving rather than lamentations.
After all ... I'm stuck here as one of you - regardless of the who's stuck with whom situation.

So - in other words: You might try to spend the night hiding from the shadows ... or give the night life a chance. It's not all ... drugs and sex and rock and roll. The day also has plenty of that!

Anyway ... I hope this to be a bit of an inspiration ... carrying a new optimism.


Have a nice one!