A bunch of stuff

Outrage

I feel like the task of "setting a few things straight" has been an ongoing problem of humanity at large. And often enough that's a matter between respect and violence.
Why and how human beings are motivated to violate the needs of harmonious coexistence is beyond me - but, that's what we have to start with.

Like ... can we agree ... on that it's important? Like, to begin with?
Because, that's like the first step, but also the first issue.

But so - to advance on the matter of "setting things straight" - let's talk about toddlers and maturity. And I don't mean literal toddlers, but the figurative, "adult" type.
And so we have to talk about trans issues, or trans rights - rather.
Why? Well ... just ... "wait for it".


There has certainly been an effort to make anti-trans rhetoric to appear ... like it's the adult position. The sober, sane and grown-up thing. Anti-trans activists will so sit there, in front of cameras, dressed like adults in a serious looking space and have calm discussions over how we and our allies are the crazy ones. But to us, ... let me paint you a picture. Imagine, that instead of talking about how crazy the transes are; They were talking about raping your 10 year old daughter. (Or trying to convince you, that you're supposed to be OK with them doing so.)

And what I think often gets overlooked is how they're actually even doing that. Well, imagine a world in which your underage daughter who got pregnant after getting raped is still forced to bear that child. I mean, it kind of sounds like something a bunch of sadistic assholes would come up with in a smoke-filled backroom while laughing their asses off over how fun it is to fuck over the poor and defenseless.
But of course they wouldn't show you that on camera. Instead they're caught arguing for how marriage to minors should be legal because fertility is key. But somehow they've convinced people that WE are the groomers.


There might be some reason to this insanity; But I'm afraid it's an insidious one.

I mean - these people that project these "Work Hard" ethics to you, Christian values, the good of the nuclear family, facts over feelings and all that - they could be doing a good thing. Cultivating those values is neat - and people who agree with those are probably fine folks! And if you can't find any reasonable intersection with the queer crowd, that sure is a thing to hold on to.
However ... the issue begins with how they mix in dissent over people who SUPPORT the queer crowd. Like, at first ... that's not an issue. You can believe in hard work and have Christian values and all that - and still at least technically "Support" Queer folks. And I suppose there's a palette of flavors of "Support for Queer people" that they can point to saying that they're not homophobic. There are even gays. It's just that we kind of have to shut up about it, right? It's like ... rule #1: Don't get caught!
But apart from who said what, why and how - because once we get into the details of expressions, how to most accurately say something and the semantics of it all things get crazy - be mindful over how those attitudes that are projected to you corrupt those good, Christian values.

I mean - "Don't get caught" - might appear like a good and tolerant position. It's certainly more lenient than "Don't be it, like ever". But while you can wallow in that feeling of overwhelming generosity, you have to wonder: What's the difference?
And situations where that's EVER going to REALLY matter are barely the kind that's suggested to you. Where we, the hair-dyed, piercing wearing, big-mo-fo with a wig in a sailor moon costume type coming at you "shoving it down your throats". No, it's usually - I'd argue - one of two situations that are most common:
1) A crowd of assholes harassing queer people merely for existing.
2) A family member feeling left out.
And 2 is ultimately what matters first.

I mean: If you have a gay son or a lesbian daughter - and you keep on, innocently I assume, insisting that they get into a straight relationship - you start boxing them 'out'. They themselves, as the individual they are, start to feel like they don't belong around you. Instead they learn that there is this illusion of them, "the straight child", that you like to believe in. That compares to your family always talking lies over whatever might be important to you. Like, in front of strangers. Not that queer people don't have other things that are important to them also.

And consider this: The mean reason why Queer relationships/households look so weird, at least as far as you could tell, might just be because at large, queer people have been expelled from whatever "normal" households they initially grew up in.

So, ask yourself this: What do people who argue that it's OK to sacrifice your kids if they're queer, do to your Christian values and faith in the nuclear family?


Or in other words, ask yourself this: What does it mean to be "WOKE"?


Because to me it seems that being 'woke' - when conservatives accuse someone of it - comes down to trying to tell people to not be assholes. And if you think you value Christian values - but you also don't want to be 'woke' - what makes you Christian again?

I mean - I'm a bit at a loss, because I don't really know WHEN conservatives think that being gay or trans is OK. That's why I have this strawman of "don't get caught". That's me trying to make sense of it. "Just don't shove it down our throats" ... doesn't really help me understand it either! Like, at which point - by merely existing - am I crossing the line? And there clearly are people - out and loud - on the conservative spectrum that ... do not have ANY ... kinds of sympathies for us.
And so again: Love your neighbour as you love yourself - when?

Like, don't do to others what you don't want to be done yourself. Like so, a lot about Christ having been here on earth has been about "bearing your cross". That also means that often enough you just have to accept that there are people out there that do deserve a good-ol left or right hook straight to the jawline - that you'll have to spare.

But then, what good are people doing that try to convince you that queer people are the bane of civilization? You should realize, that as you're conditioned to raise your fist, you are turning into the aggressor. If you are further surrounded by people who keep on talking about "civil war" - while you're the one encouraged into violence - that you are about to be OK with burning down Civilization - if only to get back at "them Libs". Is that ... Christian? At least it's not woke - right?


So - there's something about "being the Adult in the room". And to that end, we can also talk about science. Because ... that's what being grown up and responsible entails. But that's not necessarily the right way to deal with toddlers; Or ... "juvenile delinquents" rather.

As I've started by pointing out how "they" act all grown-up, they might have also convinced you that the 'real science' supports their position. Another ... problem here is that if you believe that, without having any real knowledge of the science, it becomes an argument of faith; And not science.
I mean, people will be saying that there are only two genders - and that already defies what the term GENDER even means, scientifically speaking, nowadays. It might make you feel as though science has created this swamp of "new terminology" that only exists to "push the trans agenda" - and that has so far led to this counter-push to only acknowledge two sexes based on whatever. Understand however, that if you want to be a grown-up and have a reasonable, science-based discussion on the matter, that you first have to set aside your feelings and be prepared to 'learn' first.

I mean ... GENDER is a thing. It used to mean that you belong in either of two boxes. Which box that would be, was determined by what's between your legs. Also sometimes referred to as your "biological sex". The first thing that would come up are intersex people and what falls into that spectrum, like Hermaphrodites.
Where notice: The first Biblical term referring to God, Elohim, is technically an intersex term.
"Transphobes" like to belittle and dismiss these as an anomaly. Saying, basically, that exceptions confirm the rule. And technically that's correct. I mean, we can agree on that - unless we're trying to be specific.
Like ... what if you're intersex, even just a little? So, once your biological sex is ambiguous - it's not scientifically accurate to just pretend like it isn't. And over long or short we come back to GENDER. While some people feel entitled to try and tell YOU what YOU are, based on THEIR interpretation of what sex and gender OUGHT TO BE, you also have your very own interpretation about your very own cultural, societal and sexual experiences relating to that. I mean, for every time that a person would try and tell you what a man or a woman ought to be - they admit that this isn't as self-understood as they would like it to be. And because a lot of it comes down to upbringing, people like to say that GENDER ... "wait for it" ... is a social construct.

If you then say that parts of it are innate to our biological sex, you would be right. But what then of people who innately act against those supposedly innate sexual gender traits?
It's like they say: You can't have your cake and eat it too - except, by that way of saying it it's implied that you can. It never made sense to me. Does that make me a psycho?
For those who don't know: It's supposed to say that you can't eat your cake and have it too - like ... to eat it and have it not be gone.
Whatever.
And so the 'modern' "idea" with Gender is, that it refers to an individual's way with their ... things. And to my experience it's a triad between biological influences, cultural influences and personal well-being. Like so do some trans-people for instance base their understanding of transness on a strong feeling of discomfort with their biology.

So - for the sciency people: How could you DEBUNK this classification of Gender?

You can only debunk it based on your own experiences - assuming that everyone feels like you. And by that you're assuming that all those that don't fit that idea are ... either just pretending or mentally ill or something; And so you either assume that you have to "fix their gender" or "cleanse the earth" or something.
Like ... Autogynephilia. For some reason it is an insulting term for us trannies. (I am allowed to use that word). It implies as much as that we're just perverts. And while it doesn't specifically talk about us - it still triggers our own imposter syndrome. Because, well, counter to the gender 'dysphoria' we experience, there's also gender 'euphoria'. And for some reason those of us that have grown used to constant dysphoria, the concept of things that feel right or good is like ... abstract. And that's not an exaggeration! It feels ... wrong and abnormal. Like ... we're not supposed to.
But say then ... I'm a pervert that likes to pretend they're a woman. So, like it's just a Kink. Tell me then why I don't have these innate things that are supposed to make me a man! You might try to argue that they're there somewhere, but that I've learned to ignore them. But in the same vein I could try to tell you that you're actually a vegetable because you certainly have those innate things that make you feel like a vegetable. You only have learned to ignore them!

So, to resolve this: Naturally people can be wrong about their Gender. That's a natural consequence of the fact that it isn't ... "the same as biological sex". The reality of Gender so is still closer to "whatever you feel like" than it is to what biology would have - even if the majority of people would happen to feel Gender congruity with their biological sex. And respectively do some ancient cultures recognize a third gender. In the western world I suppose there are terms like "faggot" or "dyke" - which naturally is an expression of this heterocentric bigotry we've been talking about.


Well, "men can't get pregnant", they say. Once we've come to terms with Gender; And understood that Gender terms still strongly lean towards the sexual dichotomy; The question for how to regard it becomes important. And there are like two sides to this: Either you give it to 'us' to "identify as who we are" - so, to express how we feel as to be treated accordingly - or you try to patiently ignore and override that. And this to me is one instance where respect comes to matter.
By asking me to respect your transphobia, you're disrespectful of me simply trying to exist free of constant dysphoria. Which should have more weight?

So, if someone with a uterus - and yea, this is where all that "Weird Gender Language" comes in - "Identifies" as a man; To say that their Gender congruity aligns with male biology; "General Wokeness" implies that we treat 'him' as such. A man.
He is thereby still - unless that's no longer the case - still a "birthing person". And I get why some people might feel upset about this "slang".

In a way some appropriation has been going on. The issue is that there are words, like man and woman, that mean a particular thing. And, to be fair, if we say Gender extends beyond the common sexual dichotomy, we're almost like ... the ones required to come up with words other than man or woman. Except ... for a lot of us ... it's not that complicated! I mean, to me - my Gender identity also encompasses procreation. I would love to be able to get pregnant. Even if ... I might not make a good mother.
But so, it seems like you need new words if all you care about is someone's procreational function. Here I'm a third type - which is: Infertile.

How about Pipus, Ura and Infe. The thing is, a lot of people might feel discomfort with those terms. And that, probably, because they don't want to be boiled down to their reproductive capacity.
Like, we could consider it rude to use reproduction specific pronouns ... because it is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!


Conversely we could have terms for the more simple ... sexualized terms. Like ... Donkey, Hoe and Garlic. And yea, there are Pips that are Hoes, Urs that are Donkeys and ... all the possibilities.
And the closer we get to Gender, the more abstract things get. Until we're basically back around recognizing the three grand archetypes. Except, what they specifically entail depends on what scope they're applied to. I mean ... male and female is a pretty common thing. Things that go into things - are there a lot. We might describe them as male and female ... because of our own things that go into things or things that other things go into ... but one mustn't forget that neutral is also a thing that yet exists.
I mean - people sure have already tried to make the argument that male and female is based on very clearly defined "plug and play" type features - but that logic is bent against itself when recognizing that we can see this type "Gender" everywhere, with vastly different things. If you want it to be only about what's in between your legs - well, you're isolating yourself from people that acknowledge that there's more. And that's like ... the conversation we're having these days? Like ... really?


Like, are you certain that that's the entirety of what you want to make your identity about? You know, red flag, four letters, consistently at odds with their own ideals ... .

So, adult talk: I might go and say that "she" did not write Harry Potter. A lot of people might not know who "she" is, but a lot do know the books "she" 'allegedly' wrote. And yea, why not? I'm free to "transvestigate" her - pointing out that "her" book is awkwardly contradicting "her" own ideals.
It certainly looks like that book (those books) were written by someone else. I can make that 'recognition' my identity, say facts don't care about your feelings and move on to calling it a scientific fact while arguing that everyone who disagrees is a shill. I mean, it is basically as certain as that "he whom libs call orange man" is a Pedophile.
But, "no Kink shaming" I guess?
I mean - I'm down for that, but ... it's when Kink gets a little bit accross the line that it's ... something else. I mean, Kink is all about being a little too close to a few lines ... that when crossed ... are like ... out of bounds. And it is that where it's not Kink shaming anymore; But ... I don't want to get stuck on this discussion right here.


But, more to the point, do either of those happen to make a big fuzz out of things, in ways that aren't very "mature". It shouldn't be a too controversial oppinion that both belong into an asylum - the type that gets one's internet rights revoked - thinking of how Hannibal Lecter wears this mask that I always thought is to prevent him from talking. Because nobody should listen to them.
Weal, realistically it should take a lot more than just my opinion to get them locked away for good - which, well. If that's my opinion then ... maybe not ... . But, yea - it should take more than just "an opinion".
But that's almost too sympathetic towards them.
I mean, there's this rough group of people that they're a part of, where there's also some "Clown" wannabe psychiatrist that dresses up like a Batman villain. And they've like ... found a way to be savages within the confines of a civilized world. Like, plotting the downfall of democracy and a holocaust and the raping of girls ... turned into a civilized discussion. Like so, they've "done nothing wrong" - except all the times when they did something wrong - whether we know about it or not - which makes me wonder: How would we know when we stopped another dark age from happening? I mean, that's like ... the plotline of the day, isn't it?

Who is the Dark Lord? Who will bring about a Dark Age when not stopped? And how would we know when we stopped it - like, wouldn't people just argue that it wasn't ever going to happen and then continue "Dark Lording" around until eventually we give up just to find out that ... "it was them all along!"?
"Plot Twist!"

Well, this isn't meant to be funny! I suppose that acting like incompetent imbeciles makes them somewhat sympathetic towards people who don't know it any better; But ... there are times when you should actually listen to what they're saying! Like ... in my Bubble people like to say that every accusation is an admission. That's a thing because time and time again it's like "the guy who yells GROOMER!" that turns out to be a Groomer.
So, when they say that "who controls the youth controls the future" - while pointing fingers at the Queers - they're not only quoting Hitler, they're also trying to convince YOU to lay the future of the youth into THEIR hands. And based on what? That they're pointing at people whom you're told to not like!
And as with "her" who 'definitely didn't write Harry Potter although people claim "she" did' - there are the words that "allegedly" speak of what's in their mind ("poor little Harry, abused by his parents, having fun and adventure with friends in a magical world") - while their real world actions speak a different language ("poor fucks buy into this bullcrap and give me money"). I mean - often enough we're the villains of our own stories - and they're like the answer to the question of what if someone tried to totally lean into it.

I mean, I also find it kind of hillarious what 'Anti-Fa' nowadays means to a specific audience.
But, it's actually super serious, because that's simply a function of someone in need of a bogeyman. And Antifa just so happens to be a thing ... no matter how vague or abstract the thing is ... on the Left. Or rather: Anti-Right.


Anyway ... there was an attempt, at being the adult in the room. I'm seeing myself out now! Let's see ... E for ... Exterminator ... and Z for Zoo ... .

Religion and Politics

The main reason why there's so much "politics" in "my stuff" these days is because that's where the issues "seem to start". I mean, I would love for "my stuff" to not be "political", but that's where we're at now.

I mean - if we lived in this perfect world where we had world peace and everything was fine; So that all that rhetoric of mine where I say we need God for those reasons were mute; We could move on just fine and it'd merely be a thing about truth and science. So, religion in a world like the one where religious freedom is a good thing.

As religiosity however tries to take over - and that's also true in Gnosticism because Gnosticism also requires balance between its own religions - things go out of what because people try to push their beliefs upon others. And that's not 'pushing' in the sense of "merely existing", but 'pushing' in the sense of persecution.
I mean, we're not the ones pushing for a "list" of some sort that denotes an individuals sexual backgrounds.

I mean, it's tiring to have to always to anticipate the "whataboutisms" that take place there. And that's also part of why things are so political. It's like ... merely having an opinion is political. Anything that isn't for downright Anarchy without any sense of justice is ... political.

Trying to say: "Love your neighbor as you love yourself" - is political.
Trying to say: "Hey, I know God!" is political.
Trying to say: "I'm God's F***ING CHOSEN!" is political.

And surely because of the rats tail with people who try to push their own narrative on the matter. Like how getting the religious to believe that "You" of all people are "the Chosen" translates into political influence which translates into ... money I guess.

And, I guess the only way to really be not political these days is by turning around, bending over and saying "Yes! Harder Daddy!".
Like, not doing so is called "Feminism" and is super evil, apparently. Allegedly the downfall of civilization also because "men want to be men".


Here's a thing: In as far as the Internet is an intellectual tool, the world has - since it has infiltrated all our lives - sort-of become more intellectual. Not intelligent. But I guess that's what we're working on these days. But apparently we're also doing so in all the wrong ways.
The thing to it is, that it's become more difficult for the less intelligent to have things their way. I mean, even if you just want to post your dang food on instagram, you need to have some kind of wits about you. And, it wouldn't surprise me if these "dang intellectuals" have been the bane of all powermongers. I mean, 'strong men' aren't 'smart men' - most of the times. A strong man speaks to what people want and steelman's their desires into a hopefully prosperous future. But then it's usually down to the intellectuals to make that prosperity happen.

Like, anyway.
Intellectualism has led to Liberalism and Liberalism has led to Chaos. That much I think is ... evident from the logic of it. Intelligence is Liberal, and Liberty is Chaotic. The less intelligent can't handle Chaos; And so they end up looking for ways to curb it. And in as far as intelligence doesn't provide, they turn against it.

That seems to be called "making the tough decisions". Tough because they seem to defy the intellectually distilled principles of liberalism. And that then takes us closer to a "might is right", "Harder, Daddy!" type of world. And you can't tell us that it's the responsible thing to do and that we have to trust it and that things will be fine - when there are REAL problems that are getting ignored thereby. Because ... money I guess.


I mean, how tough is tough - and when is it too much?


Merely rhetorical questions for the conclusions are rather inevitable. So, instead ... we get politicians that are stuck LARPing while the population certainly isn't ... .
Well, I mean ... if all that news outlets write about it is: "The Greens/Libs/Whatever try to take away your Hamburgers" - it's what people call "manifacturing consent". So it would seem that the population is against responding to climate change. If actual reports of the climate changing was in the forefront and not treated as a fringe, niche topic for nerds only - things might be different!

Like ... why have I so far not have externsively learned about the effects of microplastics in our ecosystem?
And sure - I mean: If the sea levels keep rising and the temperature keeps going up - that's like a failure for a climate conscious society. If we had paid enough attention; Those news would be disastrous and indicative of our failure. These days however it shouldn't surprise anyone because ... the reality we live in.


...

I meant this to be short ... I have other things to do.

My take on Ultra Instinct

Well it's dumb and I hate it. Sort of.

But to preface this with a little tie in to what I've written here so far, there's this thing: The "popular opinion". It's something I've learned about - to say, I might as well embrace it. Ever so often it seems like the right thing to do - but it feels weird or wrong because, let's be frank: The popular opinion often times sucks!
And it's not supposed to be that way! I mean - I don't think it is! But, what we might have going on here is like a reverse trans allegory. To say, it's an instance where the trans allegory has to be re-applied onto reality. So, like ... learning from art that's inspired by reality.

Like so, growing up "as a trans person" - already implies that something's wrong. I tried to fit into the gender assigned to me at birth; And based on that I'd develop a mental illness of sorts based on denying my true gender. I didn't notice how much I had gotten used to the dysphoria - and the liberation of coming out has since yet again be overshadowed by sacrifices for the sake of social conformity.
But ... at least at the heart of it ... I've overcome the worse of it.

And that's how I feel about society. That we're so accustomed to swimming in shit that we dare not envision a world without it.


Meet ... Ultra Instinct. The thus far final evolution of the personified "everything wrong with Dragonball Z" - or at least: The public perception of it.

I mean, I'm not talking about the art. I suppose there's some skill and consideration involved when crafting a compelling transformation. But ... I mean ... first I thought Red hair was stupid. Then all of a sudden it got Blue. Then Frieza all of a sudden was Gold, and now Piccolo is Orange? Like, what the fuck is going on?

And reading into what the Dragonball fanbase is curious about nowadays is ... it's wild. What the fuck is a "Beast Gohan"?

I mean, I can kind of make sense of it. But it makes no sense in "my Dragonball". I mean, it's established that Gohan has this hidden potential; But is also more like a pacifist. So, Beast Gohan ought to be ... "what happens when". The problem is that that already happened before; It's called "Super Saiyan 2" or "Ascended Super Saiyan" - a.k.a. what happened in the Cell Saga.

I once saw a video where someone lined out how the Goku of DB Super is nothing like the Goku from DB(Z). Pointing out how Goku has more so been highlighted as this Brainless Himbo that doesn't understand meditation. Going deeper into the substance one could point out that the symbol on Goku's suit has changed - which is like a visual indicator that it's Goku from Super and not the Original. Some - myself included - might see some kind of "Character Assasination" going on there. And given that the Creator of Dragonball had some hands in it, I have some further thoughts on that one.


Dragonball Super is Dragonball for the Simple Minded. A.k.a. those that either didn't pay enough attention to what's going on in Dragonball, or simply those that couldn't get the various 'subtle nuances' of the original. It's Toriyama basically going like "alright, fuck it!" - turning Goku into this hollowed out version of himself, playing make-belief in a world where every one is actually beneath him.

I mean, this is a world in which ... the next thing to happen were Goku or someone figuring out the Kaioken and calling it ... I don't know ... Super Berserk Ultra God Super Saiyan Hyper State or whatever.
I mean, it doesn't quite have that infantile ring to it. It ought to be something more like God Berserk Big Dick in Your Mouth Giga Kadooken or so. I mean, you're trying to say "I enjoyed filming your daughter getting raped by me" without saying it. The Level two is the addition "and you had to watch powerlessly". And Level 3 is "I ate your son while doing so" ... or "off screen", it kind of depends.

There's a real way of saying that people who serious enjoy this shit are like bitches that wanna get railed by either one of those Characters.


I mean, such are the symptoms of this superficial world we live in these days.

I mean ... I don't know their english name - but, there's that white Cat that they get the Senzu Beans from. That's basically where Goku learned Ultra Instinct. It was like ... a whole thing. And from there on out, arguably, there was nothing Goku could have learned in that regard. Every shortcoming thereafter would merely be a physical restraint; Not a skill issue.

"Blink and you'll miss it"

And, although originally it might have been for comedy rather than purpose, we can say that that's why Roshi's training regimen focussed so heavily into developing physical strength; Rather than technique. Roshi had, anyway, good reason to believe that their technique was good enough. Further, Roshi canonically made it to the white Cat also. It can explain why Roshi is consistently better than his physique might indicate.
And it only continues with Goku's training at Kami's palace or with King Kai. I mean, Popo was Goku's first sparring partner in ... like forever or ever at all ... that could, say, physically outmaneuver him; And King Kai - outside of teaching Goku a few ways to work with Ki couldn't really do much but increase the weights either.

Fun fact: The Spirit Bomb is a logical next step from the Kamehameha, but highly ineffective. I would further argue that Cell didn't really know the Kamehameha - as he's consistently shown to do it wrong.

Anyway - it are developments like that, that make the Character come together. I mean, so has Goku consistently found challenges at his limits - and there were so and so many things that helped him break them. Frieza was a final road-block to that end. I mean, the fun fact here is that Toriyama took inspiration from evil Landlords that would put their profits over any concept of compassion. So, think about the average person that doesn't have the means to fight against that kind of evil; Being either evicted for no reason or having their rent increased without recourse. That feeling of being lost or powerless - that's what Frieza stands for. Officially in my book anyway. So yea, Frieza is like the personified middle finger of the Dragonball universe.
So at last it took a thing of real divine intervention to have Goku overcome that - which sets Goku's official power Level at "Fuck you right back".
And with that, it would seem like the story was over. I've heard a lot of dislikes expressed over what followed. How the Super Saiyan became essentially obsolete; Setting the trend for new and funky versions of it; And thus re-inventing the whole thing for a different context. This time it wasn't a Fuck You, but near certain cataclysm. And I suppose that Gohans transformation versus Cell was also the Conclusion to the "emotional motivator" theme associated with the Super Saiyan. I mean, there's a movie in which the Transformation was implied to have some 'pro-life' meaning; The death of Krilin at the hands of Frieza would also suggest as much - but it's like ... the power of friendship won't stop you from getting evicted. So, that was still a thing that Toriyama hadn't resolved - thus it became SSJ2. And so the Buu saga ... well.
It started as tomfoolery, got Serious for a moment but still overall the vibe is like ... "Oh no! A Superpowerful Enemy! What are we gonna do?" - gets offed by a single blow.

Or not. Because Buu ... is Buu. There's a question: Why was Buu capable of competing with SSJ3 after absorbing Gohan? From there we can go on to say that there IS a power gap - and hence still room to grow. Except ... that had no place in the story. I mean, if we want to translate Buu into real world experiences, he's "THE demon". The unkillable thing - the "intangible problem". Like ... Climate Change. Or Fascism. Not THE Fascist, but the very concept of fascism. And yea, so he starts out all innocent. He can absorb things or expell them from within - similar to Cell, but on a deeper, more abstract Level - and so, under the right conditions, can evolve into a monstrous threat. Esoterically we can say something about how he could absorb/assimilate Family and Friends, which is where the threat becomes tangible - while the beast itself remains abstract.
That is to say that Buu is conceptually invincible with no real fixed power ceiling. He can always be stronger than what he's up against. Or it. Because he's like ... "double the trouble".
For nuances then: There was this magenta Orb that Buu threw at Goku - just prior to him attempting to go SSJ3. We can argue, that this was an attack to prevent Goku from doing that; After having figured out what the SSJ3 is; Because he knew that without having absorbed a compatible Saiyan, he could not beat it.
Further, because the Saiyans he did absorb weren't capable of SSJ3, I think this: Buu relies on his own knowledge or insight to tap into the power of what he absorbs. So, if we speak of metaphysical boundaries to what power levels there are, Buu can bypass those based on the knowledge that the potential is there. So, right turned into wrong is also a theme with this thing anyway. If Buu didn't know the power of the SSJ3, he couldn't tap into it - I'd say - even if whom he absorbed had it. For all they know, they only know OF it - not that they have it in themself. But seeing the power - he could look for it and tap into it.

And yea, so - ultimately that meant that we got a Power of Friendship ending after all.


From a different perspective, Buu is essentially Kirby with Dragonball (Villain) powers. And because Kirby can conceptually assimilate everything to the point where actual Stars are merely abstract suggestions - his power Level is also an unknown. But like power levels can be complicated and not always clear given what we might call "Alchemical Asymmetry" - the same applies to weaknesses.
Which is like ... how Goku was nearly killed by an unseeming lame ol' Virus.

And that's also why, Hot Take, I think that Sailor Moon (or the Sailor Team) could have actually beaten Buu. I suppose that's kind of how he got defeated the first time around.

X4.01-b | So far/Clarification needed?

I guess my confidence in that I could explain my next steps were a little bit misplaced.
I mean, I'm still very much in line with my blueprints, except the void in between has - as expected - turned out more complicated that I could have given it credit.

By that I mean that I'm like ... operating on limited RAM. I mean, it's pretty much the same thing. Like ... in any Open World game it's a silly thing to have the whole world loaded into RAM. So instead you let the engine focus on what's supposed to be visible only; And load things in and out as needed.
And while I can so make out the scenery in the distance, I don't fully comprehend it until I'm there. So to speak.
And for that reason have I started to draw things out in the first place. Or why I had to write on and off explaining things to me - just to then cover more ground than I could realistically keep track of.

Something I was about to tell you, but omitted for brevity, is in about as much. That ... the amount of work I yet have to do isn't always clear to me - but at certain points it does become a little bit more evident.
Also - what I'm currently working on feels like the Shadow Realm (Elden Ring) - where you can make out a whole lot of stuff in the distance; And some things that appear beyond reach are easier to reach than some others that wouldn't seem so unreachable.
I mean, some things also only appear when putting the map together.
Like ... the Abyssal Woods are like ... that.
Also ... the amount of time it took for me to get to Bonny Village. I mean - I left the area assuming the way had to be somewhere else; And then kind of found it by accident, suspecting that I might have missed something.

Overall - I'm like ... bad bad at finding secrets in Videogames. I mean, so - I got to the room from which you make it Shaman Village. And after walking the perimeter a couple of times - the map from the finger person certainly didn't help - I deduced that the entrance had to be hidden behind the statue, but I didn't know which emote to use. Turns out - that after trying to explore every corner of Bonny Village, I still missed the emote. And then ... well ... good luck finding it.

It's like ... almost a certainty that I'll miss such things. I'll go about, searching everything - and the ONE time I pass on a thing thinking that it's probably nothing ... it's not nothing. And that doesn't seem like mere accident. It's like something inside of me is preventing me from looking.


Well, it's an acceptable trade-off I assume.

I mean, for my "little" coding adventure the reality seems to be the opposite. And yea. Last time I wrote of something where I, after explaining something to myself, realized that my original idea was the stupid one. Well, turns out ... I ended up thinking that way because the solution I had initially passed on was simple; And after just doing it because why not - it was like there; Anyway; And I had no reason to not do it that way. The other way would have been unneccessarily complicated. Turns out however ... it's bugged. And I don't know why. I mean ... it shouldn't be. Things that work and couldn't work any other way don't work in that one way that they should - and that's what I call a Mystery Bug. I mean - I have a line of code somewhere that's telling me of a condition that shouldn't ever be met. And all of a sudden that message shows up in my log on repeat. And it shouldn't repeat! Maybe I overlooked how it might, but ... regardless. I added a (Whaaaat?) to the message because I never expected to see it!


And yea, ultimately there are upsides to doing it the complicated way - but they have to be done with a little bit more consideration, err ... foresight or planning, that way. Yielding better results then, at least technically, with a little bit more flexibility or technical cohesion.

And so, my work these days has been ... really slow. Like, there's also still some cleaning up I need to do - being mindful of not going Super OCD on it - but so I'm wiggling my way forward. Little by little. I mean, so to not rush anything mindlessly. Like, that's the last thing I want.

I mean, the main reason why I've now been sitting on this one problem for so long because it's vastly complicated, I'd say. And going in, assuming that my blueprints were alright, I thought it'd mostly just be a matter of writing up all the pieces. But because of my limited RAM, sometimes the implied logic between various pieces makes more and other times less sense. And so I was met with a case where ... the task at hand obscured my understanding of some of it.


So, do I know what I'm doing? Well, within certain limitations!

So far I had to draw me a general roadmap of what to next do - such that I would focus on the right things and not get lost in the complexity of it all. Here the idea is to get the right things to work. That's critical when working with complex situations - because else ... you wrote up a whole bunch of code - and to then figure out what's wrong takes you back to square one.

And it's frustrating - when you think you got to do "this thing" but some invisible hand or brain-barrier is preventing you from doing it. That'd be an instance of me not being fully aware of what I'm doing.

I guess you could compare this to walking on an invisible pathway ... like in a videogame. There's usually some way to test whether the space ahead is walkable - without being able to directly touch it. Except I got the "stubborn" version - which is where I have to realize that I'm running into a wall - and find the way around it. Well ... the right way around it - not the way back to a reboot.


But apart from all that - well. It's insidious, kind of, just how much of stuff can be hidden behind the arrow in a "one thing -> another". And ... sometimes I feel like I just discovered fire - and concluded that discovering nuclear energy is just around the corner. Yea. Easy!

Anyway. So, apart from all that ... I'm not so sure ... just how important it is.


I mean, so far I don't have a real reason to think that any of it is important at all. And if anything of it had any importance; That's none of what I'm currently working on. I mean, I could/might take my project into a different, more meaningful direction - but that seems even more off limits to me right now than what I'm currently working on.

Which is possibly also why I don't like to mention it.
And maybe we're not doing it out of a little bit of spite also.


So - next time I'll comment on this I'll either have a video I can tell you more about; Or I'll try to just shut up about it.


Except ...

The Project?

I think this might be an instance where I can't tell you what it is you "need" to know. Because for once it isn't mine to tell you. It's like ... maybe you're looking at the wrong things; And it's not my responsibility to correct you, as in: Me being forcibly removed from doing so.

Like, here's a thing: Iterating on a sentiment I meant to express the last time, there's this spiteful "as if she(me) was capable of such and such" feeling that I get (implying that I'm utterly incompetent), as if you would be able to relate to that attitude. As if it were self-understood that I could not, quite possible.
Yet ... as far as that - the defiance of expectations - is being concerned, well. Let me think ... rhetorically. I look at "my numbers" - and take from it that people lack the capacity to take the whole Matrix thing for what it is. So, to dwell on it for a sec, for the sake of formulating words: You are incapable of accepting reality (as it pertains to me, probably), and yet think you're capable of accurately telling what I am and am not capable of?

Certainly this attitude of mine would only lead to further spitefulness thrown my way. Always upping the ante while blatantly glancing past the obvious. I mean, how much of the stuff that couldn't quite possibly have been the case has turned out to be THE case, so far?

And it's like - whenever I'm at the end of the road, having done all I could and, quite frankly, made a good point for my case - I'm left required to back all that up, yet again, with yet something else.

And so we're back at the shouting game. Which, I'm aware, isn't done until I'm done - I suppose. But "the other thing" - that's not only standing on its own to feet - it's like ... already going to college at this point.


And yea. If there's something worth expanding upon here, it's this ... thing. Where people dig out a problem for people to obsess over - to distract them from the more obvious issues. Which, to be fair, aren't within my reach to do any more about than I already have done. Which might imply that I have to keep on writing about it - like, there's always more that can be said until it gets taken seriously by enough people - but why am I the one focused on those things while some people seem to have nothing better to do but to "yell at me"?


Sure, "in Minecraft"/just in my head.

But it's not just me. Maybe this is just how my mind makes sense of the greater situation at hand.
Like yea - it's up to "us" to fix climate change while the high and mighty are like ever only increasing the harm they do to our ecosystems. So they're yelling at us like we haven't done enough whenever we tell them to fucking DO SOMETHING!

Well, what they then do is turn around and tell people that it's just a hoax. Go figure!

And there are a bunch of other things that bug me. I mean, talking about Astair - I can't help but feel like people feel like I have control over any of it. Which is where we're back at people yelling at me, this time specifically, for no real reason but whatever they've convinced themselves of.


So, maybe I have to go off a hint here and write about what my Remixes are about?
Because yea, it makes no sense whatsoever, but something as inconspicuous as a bunch of cheaply made remixes ought to be the most important thing ever. Right?
Or could it be that there's like a debate over who "the Real DJ Genki Dharma" is?
The fuck if I know! I don't know any other!


And yea, I guess it isn't easy to have a mind this burdened by every little thing it has ever done or even thought about. So, I do take an occasional moment of relief from hoping that one of the things I do might one day maybe push through the ceiling. Or door. Whatever. And that means that I maybe make more of what I'm working on than is warranted. Which right now ... is like ... only this project of mine. Yea, "go figure".

And here is me thinking that the world is on fire - well, I guess my programming is more important than that. Not saying that I put my programing over putting out the fire - but that for some reason I feel like some people out there make it out like that.
And all the other ways in which they might misconstrue what I'm doing.

But yea. Seriously? I would LOVE to work with all those cool people that make all that cool art that I very much enjoy! I would love to be able to work on tangible art - give a little bit of input while also trying to be the world's most awesome person in other ways.

Like, who wouldn't? That's like ... the stuff that dreams are made of!
"Tips (nonexistent) Fedora".


I mean, yea - I've gone thoroughly insane and back - like, I could say: Y'all don't know the depths I've crawled out of - and probably be justified to do so.

But yea. So, a few things you maybe should know about my remixes: 1) I don't understand Japanese. It just sounds cool. I guess I understand a few words, but ... not enough. I figured, in hindsight, that the Japanese text does make sense in context - ever so often - roughly on par with the rest. The ending of Flower of Carnage however ... is really just more of a mood thing. Similar to Goodnight Moon - though that one arguably makes more sense.
But I have no literal Blade by my bed - nor do I have Guns or a Tux. And my cash is somewhere else also.
2) There is no "alternate ending" - and that's like the whole point. I mean - maybe that's just my internalized self-corrupting belittlement, but I keep being bothered when I see how things I do could be like flipped on their head. Like so, I set out to make a remix with a certain message on mind. Of course, because it's a remix, I'm limitted with what words there are - so, there's going to be some ... creative tolerance. And within that tolerance then comes "the Grinch". And as I do one remix after the other, chronologically speaking, and that awareness keeps growing, part of my motivation - within those Remixes or the message - is about annihilating that Grinch. So, a perhaps imaginary bad guy that tries to usurp my efforts - like: The first time the track that goes "being dead is weird" plays, it's clearly a dizz. Mixed with mood and flavor, but still a dizz. The whole track is like a dizz track at "the real losers". So, the second time when it goes "being horny is weird" - which is actually a separate track - one might take it as a secret message that I'm actually like horny for whatever I've dizzed in the first time around. And such things bother me. But actually it's more just a play on that strange feeling of being aroused by something that should, maybe, feel repulsive. The two are absolutely not connected and of course I'd be saying that, which is why I do.
But then I'm like ... dismayed over the fact that I might have to explain all that. Like ... I'm bad at communicating myself.

But - that's like the whole theme here - maybe it's not ME that's the problem!


And I guess what follows is a lengthy and equally conflicted tirade on being trans versus whoever the fuck I'm in for real for real considering the various actual layers of reality we know of.

Where yea - being, or going unhinged - is like, also a theme of those remixes. That however not in the way some might ... go to the misconstruction olympics over.
I mean, it's like a natural next step - towards World Peace - that in an attempt to find inter-cultural peace and understanding, some cultural norms just have to break. That might just be what the whole "culture war" is about. And yea, weird how some dictatorship sympathizing "westerners" try to betray our values in favor of bending over backwards while saying that "we" are the actual fascists.

By the way: That passage I from the revlation "@ the angel of Philadelphia" - think that's us western civilizations. Or perhaps more specifically Europe? Either way, what it says is that we've been doing great - but ... we shouldn't take that greatness for granted.


I mean - from a Fantasy perspective there's something epic to it. Fascism was like ... the Villain rising to power; And after their defeat the lands returned to a reign of prosperity. Whatever someone's nitpicky issues with that reign might yet be.


SO yea. It may be more and more evident that this moment in history may provide a tremendous opportunity to define what our future is going to be like. And yea, if ... and that's a big IF, we're not stupid about it - it might even be great! I'm sure the prime position is yet promised to me - and so we might have a discussion on the value of prophecy versus what actually matters in either case, but ... if I learned anything, it's ... that ... magical thinking is the enemy of good faith. Like ... fear is the mind-killer. I mean, I'm not promoting fear, but I'm not promoting recklessness either. Believe it or not, there's a "middle ground" there.

Often referred to as sanity.
Can I ... be done here for now?