Maybe I should just shut up

... But lemons are still sweet.
And so the story goes.

Touching anything contemporary feels like stretching my hands into a blender. And yea, I see it now. "Touching" upon any it - in this case - is like taking a picture. At least, that's how it can be used or done. To say, it's a picture and nothing more because this is a time of change. Obviously. So, trying to hold on to anything that's in motion, as to make sense of it, or whatever, it's futile. It's a waste of time. Well, there sure are exceptions.

And on the other hand, I suppose I must have faith in myself. Or, more than I already do. Which is, a topic in and of itself that concerns everybody. Well, some have too much of it, and others have to learn what it means. I had to learn what it means. Being an introvert lost in a virtual reality, well. Yea, there sure are accomplishments in the virtual. And I guess it comes down to your individual circumstances, ultimately.
Like, we're all stuck in our own personal Videogame. We all had different starting locations, starting conditions, etc.. And the gameplay of our lives is probably also not always the same. Some have skills that let them do this and that, others have social connections/friends and family, ... well, stuff. Our interests also matter.
And then there's the opportunities or possibilities of our environment.
Our access to knowledge and understanding.


I mean, it's funny to me now - though actually it's embarassing - to think back of how I learned about arrays.
Hmm ... well. Oof. The Memory is extremely hazy. Should I be worried?
Well. I do recall the "haze" being also not as hard as oblivion. So, things may come back. And I'm just generally somewhat forgetful. Although I also do have good memory, apparently.
Anyway. I do recall that to me it was a shock that I had not known about it. I was perplexed because I felt stupid. Like ... I wouldn't have figured it out. In some time ... kind of stupid. But that's just what education is about.


Then, the development of skills also matters. If you're taught to do so, you could think of that as some kind of skill tree that is essentially drawn from your own "concept space". It's the same with work experience. You start out as a noob, and little by little you get to unlock the various stages of familiarity with the corresponding tasks and such.

And ... yea. There's a fundamental ... rift of some kind.
Let me explain:


On the one side we want to keep the youth away from drugs and videogames because it's a waste of time. And along with this waste of time may come a lifestyle that's just harmful to the planet.

That in some sense is a part of the culture war. But the culture war at large entails a lot more - so, the priorities of this particular aspect of it may weigh very little on the whole.
Uhm, I mean to say ... it's part of the culture war, but the whole situation of what's right and wrong is lost between the forces that be there pulling.

So, it's complex. It's a multilayered web. It's a Nexus of Thoughts and ideas that changes with every blip of information that is being exchanged. Well, in as far as that blip has any relevance to the thing. It's depth is multiple that of those connected to it, as it entails them and their schemes, alongside interpretations and other abstractions.
And the trick is to somehow find sense in all of it.


The "strings of Light" as it were. The truths - that "can be aligned and straightened out" - or how to put it. ... Well ...

Still part of the explanation: It ought to be adorned and encircled. To those who care to live, there must be that what that care is for. If we want to live forever, we have to make peace with the implications thereof. As we may ponder: with the increase in automation capabilities, how do we want to live? Do we want to have a say? Or do we want to give it into the hands of those that can't get enough of anything?
Do we have any choice?

Well. Another question is that of how to distribute the weight of the work that is necessary for the world we envision. Like, we can make it easy on ourselves ... and in that scenario, we can have life and we can have culture. So, I'm not trying to say that getting lost in one's room forever is good. But, I feel like ... I've been here before.


Anyway, I suppose I got a little sidetracked. Well. So, believing in myself. Faith in myself. To me personally, that means that I have to accept that at some point ... I also have to trust in others. Well.
I've been here before ...


So yea. What do I know?
I ... can't tell. I certainly feel like ... I don't even know.